The year was 1998. The Ford Mustang was the car to own, Jennifer Love Hewitt was the movie star we all had crushes on, and Godzilla severely disappointed us at the box office. Something hit America faster than an elderly man running a stop light....It was "Suck It". "Suck It" was riding the wave of success and nothing could stop him. If your boss wanted you to work longer hours; you just told him to "Suck It", when Ron Jeremy wanted to get his porno groove on, he simply told the girl to "Suck It", or when grandma told you to get your fingers out of your nose..."Suck It" was there for you. You could not find yourself anywhere in 1998 without running into someone mentioning "Suck It". He was at bars, nightclubs, college dorm rooms, high school sporting events and made numerous appearances on AOL chat.
When 1999 rolled around..."Suck It" achieved the pinnacle of success. He began appearing on WWF wrestling alongside such greats as Triple H, Chyna, HBK, Ravishing Rick Rude, and the New Age Outlaws (sorry, X-Pac sucked).
"Suck It" even added a hand point gesture to the crotch area to let persons know exactly what he meant, which only heightened his fame.
"Suck It" became so successful that he procured his own fashion line, roles in movies, television commercials, guest-spots on TV shows, and hit the late night talk show scene. "Suck It" was also in the celebrity spotlight finding himself attending Hollywood parties that only A-list celebrities such as Brittney Spears, Barry Manilow, and Rob Schneider attended. He became the rage and must have of 1999!
Like Corey Feldman, success came at an arduous price. Beginning with the new millennium, "Suck It" found himself getting in major dilemmas with the law. First, in January he was busted for possession of crack/cocaine. In March, internet photos surfaced of him doing eerie things with Chyna. Then in July, "Suck It" was caught in a child pornography web ring. America was outraged! The WWF disbanded Degeneration X (who always had "Suck It" in their corner), thus, leaving "Suck It" unemployed. Pepsi dropped him from their ads for fear of consumer backlash. Hollywood and the people who got to know and love "Suck It" cleansed their hands of him. He became the Michael Jackson of Hollywood (like Michael Jackson, the people of Latvia and Malaysia still loved him).
For five years "Suck It" laid dormant. At times, he reappeared in the back section of numerous newspapers for miscellaneous run-ins with the law. Some believed that "Suck It" transformed his image and returned as "Skeet-Skeet-Skeet" or "Git-R-Done" but this was found to be untrue.
Yet in a written letter to True Hollywood Story "Suck It" reported that he would be appearing on the next Celeb-Reality show the Surreal Life, alongside such wash-ups as: Corey Haim, Chunk from the Gooneys, Corporal Kirshner (WWF), The Popples, Dusty from GI-Joe, Top Cat of Hanna-Barbara, and Stretch Armstrong.
"Suck It" did mention that his addiction to manly-type women is an uphill battle but he is still attending therapy.