The best and worst of times.

My story on how Nickelodeon became Suckalodeon.
February 20, 2007

When I grew up in the 90's there was no bigger after school treat than sitting back, relaxing, and watching what was once the greatest kid's network ever, Nickelodeon.
It revived me from stress every day to see Rocko having another modern adventure, the Rugrats getting into trouble, Doug worrying about getting noticed by Patti, and the real monsters scaring kids and guzzling garbage.

Not to mention listening to the delightful Clarissa explain it all, laughing hysterically at Kenan and Kel's antics, getting frightened by the Midnight Society's ghostly tales, and learning what it means to salute your shorts.

Those were the days, when getting slimed was priceless, an old talking statue name Olmec told legends about a hidden temple, and doing things you can't normally do on television.

But things started to change in 1998, starting with a new Nicktoon called

"Catdog", a lame disappointing dud that was just too similar to the timeless Ren and Stimpy. Later that year there was great excitement over the premiere of the Rugrats movie, which introduced Tommy's brother Dil. While the movie turned out good, the new episodes featuring Dil were shockingly dull (but got even worse when Kimi came along). Every episode consisted of stupid toilet humor and way too much overuse of the first few season's clever jokes. And to make things worse, they grew up in 2001 and had a new series in 2003 that was painfully lame.

In 1999, the cultural phenomenon of SpongeBob began. Now I do enjoy SpongeBob, but do we really need to see 6 episodes every day? The same with Fairly Oddparents. It's amusing, but sometimes loud and obnoxious and we see way too much of it. And other cartoons like Kappa Mikey and the X's are nothing but embarrassingly stupid crap that makes you think...

WHY? (a la Kenan)

The live-action shows are even worse. Shows like Zoey 101 are all about being hip and popular and have zero charm or laughs. While the shows from the 90's were funny, lighthearted, and conciously aware of what kids really laugh at. Not cheap fart jokes, but some good slapstick with a side of slime.

It's just so unbelievable that my childhood paradise of good shows is dead. They have totally screwed up the first kid's network and killed my best friends, Rocko, Kenan and Kel, Clarissa, Boney, and Stick Stickly. Sure all the actors grew up, but they could at least play reruns of the good times instead of the worthless tripe they play today.]

Old School Nick, I will never forget you.
New Nick, I wil never forgive you.
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