Billy Madison
Release: February 10, 1995
Release: February 10, 1995

Billy Madison (Adam Sandler) is a 27-year-old uneducated slacker with a rich father. Billy is about to inherit his father's business and money, but only if he can make it through all 12 grades (2 weeks per grade) to prove that he has what it takes to take over his father's business.

Long Haired Nerd: "Are you in like, looser denial or something?"
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Billy: "It's too damn hot for a penguin to be runnin' around!"
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Billy: "Take it easy psycho. You blew it, you lose."
Eric: "I ought to blow you away."
Billy: "Well go ahead and do it. (Eric begins to fire his gun at Billy). YIKES!!!!"
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Billy Madison: "[drunk, he sees a fake a penguin] It's too damn hot for a penguin to be just walkin' around. I gotta send you back to the South Pole."
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3rd Grader: "How's high school Billy?"
Billy Madison: "High school is great. I'm learning new things and everyone is really nice."
3rd Grader: "Gee, I can't wait till I get to "hike" school."
Billy Madison: "[grabs 3rd grader's face and whispers] Don't you say that. Don't you ever say that. Stay here. Stay here as long as you can. For the love of God, cherish it. You have to cherish it."
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Billy: "He called the shit poop. Ha ha ha."
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Brian Madison: "Remember that spelling bee you won in the first grade? Rock"
Billy Madison: "Yeah, so what's your point?"
Brian Madison: "r-o-C-k!"
Billy Madison: "Oh yeah! The c is silent."
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3rd Grader: "Hey look everybody, Billy peed his pants."
Billy Madison: "Of course I peed my pants, everyone my age pees their pants. It's the coolest."
3rd Grader: "Really?"
Billy Madison: "YES. You ain't cool, unless you pee your pants."
3rd Grader: "Hey look, Ernie peed his pants too. Alright!"
Old Farm Lady: "If peeing in your pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis."
Billy Madison: "OOH. That is the grossest thing I've ever heard in my life. Let's Go."
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Veronica Vaughn: "No milk will ever be our milk."
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Frank: "When I graduated from first grade, all my dad did was tell me to get a job."
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Principal: "Mr. Madison, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul."
Billy Madison: "Okay, a simple "wrong" would've done just fine."
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Lunch Lady: "Have some more sloppy joes. I made 'em extra sloppy for yous. I know how yous kids like 'em sloppy."
Billy Madison: "Lady, you're scaring us."
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Billy Madison: "No I will not make out with you. Did ya hear that? this girl wants to make out with me in the middle of class. You got Chlorophyll Man up there talking about God knows what and all she can talk about is making out with me. I'm here to learn, everybody, not to make out with you. Go on with the chlorophyll."
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Brian Madison: "You were brought up with every advantage, I bought you everything. Toys, cars, vacations, clothes..."
Billy Madison: "Actually I, uh, stole this shirt from Frank. [Lifts his shirt to show "FRANK" written on the inside]"
Brian Madison: "Yea, well whatever, it's all my fault. I made a mistake. [Looks up to see Billy lifting his shirt]"
Brian Madison: "What? Are you some damned moron?"
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Billy Madison: "Bunt. B-U-N-T, in perfect cursive. Got any more brain busters?"
Veronica Vaughn: "How about 'Rizzuto'? [Billy ponders, then writes] Rirruto?"
Billy: "Those're 'Z's."
Veronica: "They look like 'R's to me."
Billy: "You're cheating! Rizzuto's not a word; He's a baseball player!"
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Billy Madison: "Chlorophyll? More like BOREophyll."
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Teacher: "Spell "couch"."
Little girl: "Couch. C-O-W..."
Billy Madison: "No!"
Teacher: "[to little girl] No, I'm sorry, that is incorrect [to Billy]"
Teacher: "Billy, if you spell this correctly you pass second grade."
Billy Madison: "Couch. C-O-R, uh, are you going to the mall today?"
Teacher: "No I'm not goin to the mall, keep spelling, mister."
Billy Madison: "Couch. C-O-U-C-H!"
Teacher: "That is correct!"
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Carl: "You should've eaten some triscuit crackers in the car like I did."
Eric: "If I knew you had triscuit crackers, then maybe I could've enjoyed them with you."
Carl: "I'm sorry."
Eric: "Well, sorry does not put the crackers in my stomach now, does it?"
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Juanita: "Billy, you know you shouldn't be pulling that crap in front of your father's business associates."
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O'Doyle (First Grade): "You're out! O'Doyle rules!"
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9 years, 8 months ago
dude , i use to watch thiwvery day
    9 years, 10 months ago
    I'll tell you who took those lunches...that damn sasquatch!
      10 years, 3 months ago
      YOU BLEW IT.
        10 years, 9 months ago
        This movie is SUPER Funny I love it evan the parts when the kids tell Billy to do dirty things when hes in love with the teacher.
          10 years, 9 months ago
          @bridgemon007....LMAO!! It's always funny to watch that crap (literally) until people got fire extinguishers in their home, then it just sucked after that.
            10 years, 10 months ago
            Used to watch this movie alot and even did the lighting dog poop on peoples porches. lol
              11 years, 2 months ago
              I can still watch this over and over. "If peeing your pants is cool, consider me Myles Davis"
                11 years, 6 months ago
                "snack Packs your the coolest" i love this movie
                  12 years, 2 months ago
                  Possibly Adam Sandler's silliest movie. Not too bad, but definitely (almost completely) loses it's humor after a while.
                    12 years, 6 months ago
                    do you have any more gum more gum more gum?!
                      12 years, 11 months ago
                      silliest movie ever. i have a fondness for it though.
                        13 years, 4 months ago
                        Funny movie!

                        YOU AINT COOL, UNLESS YOU PEE YOUR PANTS!
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