Captain 'N' Kevin Keene is keen on video games

The episode that started it all, "Kevin in Video Land" and no that's not a movie rental place.
On
January 23, 2005


For those of you familiar with this site you know Vertex has written an article about Captain N before, if you haven't checked it out now would be a good time...go ahead I'll wait... Ok so now you can read my article.



I rarely saw the Nintendo type cartoon shows as a kid save the Super Mario Super Show which came on Saturday mornings, Captain N however managed to elude me while I was away at school, nothing worse then turning on the TV just in time to see the end of a show you love. Anyway I did see a few which was always a cause for celebration, and I downloaded some eps. a while back, so here it is the review of the first episode "Kevin in Video Land.



The Episode starts out with a view of the planet Metroid, the home base of the antagonists, we see a huge army marching along as other monstrous things fly around menacingly. As the narrator tells us Video Land is in a dark time, Mother Brain and her army (the bad guys) are overpowering Princess Lana and her N Team (we'll get to them later). Any who Mother Brain and her two main henchmen King Hippo and Eggplant Wizard are watching as the army lays ruin to the once docile land.



In case you haven't seen this cartoon let me give you these characters characteristics, complete with a comparison to someone else you probably know of.

King Hippo is basically a brawny brainless baggy boobed blue blockhead...we already knew that from the game though. His tits are similar to Spike's cheeks from Tom and Jerry and his voice is similar also only much more retarded sounding. I'm not sure why he's blue, but his nipples are black which makes me think maybe he has frostbite or something. Hippo has no real special abilities aside from punching through walls, and interestingly they never show this guy eating anything... hmmmm.

Eggplant Wizard is the wimpy clumsy little guy who has a little higher brain capacity then Hippo and almost the same color of skin; it kind of cracks me up to think of this but Eggplant has about the same voice as that retarded meatball pushing green elephant from the zooroni commercial (you can download it anywhere). Eggplant is probably the best character rendition on this show; he even carries around that wand that turns people into walking eggplants, strangely though he never uses it for that purpose, although he does turn Kevin into a banana using a banana gun.

Mother Brain is pretty ugly and looks like a whore face attached to a brain, she of course is the brains of the outfit always coming up with new plans just waiting to be foiled. She not unlike Krang never leaves the sanctity of her cave due to the lack of a body and that's where the fore mentioned come in. Mother Brain is exactly like that plant from the musical version of little shop of horrors; they have the EXACT same voice and the same vines/tentacles that come out on command.

So their watching the army and Hippo comments that they are too strong for the enemies, Mother Brain corrects him and it turns out it is she who is too strong, and soon very she will be the ruler of Video Land Hahahahahahaha!!!!!!



Now we are taken to the last frontier, and no that's not a nuclear waste dump, that my friends' is the Crystal Palace where the N team resides. The N team is composed of four characters: Princess Lana, who is filling in as ruler since her father was exiled by Mother Brain; Simon who is an egotistical pretty boy who does not even look remotely close to the Simon from Castlevania nor as prehistoric, Simon has a magic bag that he can pull pretty much anything out of including a whip he uses to comb his hair; Megaman is short and green and he talks like those munchkins with the mega-big lollipop, Megaman has a habit of using mega before every phrase like this "I think Lana is mega-awesome" and he can make rockets and crap come out, much like Inspector Gadget, not to mention he's ultra strong; finally we have Kid Icarus, he's my personal favorite, partly because he was my favorite videogame as a kid and partly because he doesn't do that horrible squeak he did in the game, Icarus uses his bow like in the game and after every sentence he says -icus.



The defeated princess sadly prepares for the imminent fate of her land. She somberly gives her gratitude and final good-byes to her friends knowing soon the palace will be taken and the war will be over.



Hey wait a minute this is the first episode things can't end yet can they??!! NO of course not!! Suddenly a loud voice comes from a shiny statue explaining that there is another, Captain N the Game Master whom will come and fulfill an ancient prophecy!! "Behold the Ultimate Warpzone"



Meanwhile in Northridge, California a young man by the name of Kevin Keene is playing Punch Out on his Nintendo Entertainment System, there's only one problem, he can't seem to beat King Hippo... Now let's think about this a little bit, in case you haven't figured it out yet this kid is the game master and accordingly he's supposed to be able to beat every game there is, and yet he can't beat King Hippo??!! Aside from that blonde wuss in the beginning, Hippo is the easiest character there is!!




Anyway he's sitting there playing his game while his meanders around, and suddenly his television starts flashing and zaps him, pulling him inside the TV and into a different dimension, his faithful dog follows him in!! They are instantly rendered into 8 bit Nintendo characters.




The warp takes them to the Crystal Palace and Kevin begins asking the usual where am I and this can't be real stuff. Then Princess Oo-la-lana introduces herself and the rest of her companions.

Lana: I'm princess Lana
Kev: Wow! you're beautiful, what game are you from?
Lana: Er, uh... this is Megaman.
Megaman: It's a mega-honor to make your acquaintance
Kev: Hey your not megaman, your supposed to be blue and have a blaster on your hand, and what's with your helmet having an eye shield?
Megaman: Ok, ok so I'm an early prototype sketch that Capcom hashed out for this cartoon, you insensitive jerk!! (sob, sob).
Kev: Wow, I'm sorry, guess I'm getting off on the wrong foot.
Icarus: Hi I'm Kid Icarus, nice to meet you-icus
Kev: Ha ha ha ha, oh man that is ridiculous, hahahahaha.
Icarus: What-icus?
Kev: Hahahahahahahaha
Icarus: What is so funny-icus?
Kev: Hehe, nothing... nothing-icus hehehe
Icarus: Man, What a smartass-icus
Simon: So you're the game master huh?
Kev: Whoa, who are you??
Simon: I am Simon Belmont
Kev: Wow, did you bleach your hair or something? And what happened to those medieval clothes you wore?
Simon: Get real, do you really think I dress like that constantly; I shop only at the finest shops around.
Kev: Man this place sucks ass, why am I here anyways?

So they explain their plight and Lana tells him about his zapper (light gun) and power pad (Nintendo controller), these are his weapons and he uses them very well. At first Kevin is skeptical and busies himself trying to find a way to bail claiming there's no way he's the game master, but after Lana gets kidnapped from her room by Hippo and Eggplant he realizes she's his only way out.



So Kevin takes the leadership position and rallies the N team, and together they prepare to save Princess La-na-na-na-na. After arguing about which way to go Simon finally gets his way and they take his shortcut to Metroid warp zone.


The warpzone takes them to the largest shower-head and atop the largest shower-cap; from here they figure out that they took the wrong warp and are now in... drum roll please, KongoLand!! Home to none other then Donkey Kong!!



Needless to say our Ape friend is not happy about this violation and neither would I quite honestly, they saw him bathing in a pink polka-dot shower cap!! can you imagine the tabloids getting a hold of this information, those guys are ruthless and DK has an image to uphold!!



So DK does what any 100,000,000,000 pound gorilla would do, he sets out to smash them like goombas. They have their fun, meet a piranha plant, and eventually warp out of Kongoland through a volcano rock to continue the search Metroid and Lana.



Meanwhile on Metroid, Lana is giving the old lecture on not getting away with it and Mother retorts with the old your friends will never make it routine and locks her in the dungeon with that dinosaur from the Kraft mac'n'cheese commercials. Kevin and the N team arrive on the scene and make their way up to the tower where Lana is held.



Kevin disperses the cheesasaurus, apologizes for doubting her earlier, and gets a hero's thanks, but the episode is five minutes from over what will happen next?



Oh boy oh boy this is that scene that comes in every first episode, the part where the leaders meet and face off for the first time, and the hero establishes himself as the alpha-omega!! Oops my bad, she just puts them in a secret cave full of bat creatures and then vanishes.



Oh well at least this gives Kevin a chance to use his zapper and show off his mad gaming skills, good thing Duke watched him play all the time because he's a natural gamer too.



They make their way through the cave and through the obstacles, straight back too...



Mother Brain!! And unfortunately somebody unplugged Kevin's zapper and it's out of juice, now it's up to his legendary skills!



But wait, the other team members are here, this should be interesting. Hippo and Eggy are quickly taken care of by Simon and Mother Brain is sent into a violent spin by one of Kid Icarus's arrows. Kevin has no part in this what-so-ever.



Mother Brain becomes electric and Kevin chickens out saying "it's too dangerous to finish her off now" so vowing to return they leave her to tidy things up.



Back at the newly brightened Crystal Palace the N Team licks their wounds and Lana thanks them all for their work. Kevin is asked to stay but insists he must go back home, but upon approaching the portal he hears his mom saying "Keviiiin, you'd better not be playing that silly videogame, you have homework and chores to do" he decides he can stick around at least a little longer. Lana kisses him and he says his catch phrase "What can I say, I'm hooked". The End



Overall this is a pretty well put together cartoon; it had sound effects taken from games, a variety of character cameos including Bayou Bill and Robin Hood, and a few eps with Link and Zelda. If you've never seen it, at least checkout one episode, you can download a few off the net and who knows maybe you'll like it.

Well guys thanks for reading my first article, I hope it was stand able and halfway enjoyable, please feel free to PM me and let me know what you thought. Thanks again peoples and let's hear it for Captain N and the N Team!!

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