OriolesMagic
14 Posts
17 years, 8 months ago
Me and my friends were trying to come up with the greatest quotes from a comedy movie. The one we settled on was from There's Something About Mary.
"Step into my office. Your fucking fired."
I know this can be topped but my mind is going blank.
"Step into my office. Your fucking fired."
I know this can be topped but my mind is going blank.
steveo
455 Posts
17 years, 8 months ago
"Surely you can't be serious.I am serious....and don't call me Shirley." Not the greatest but a classic.
Treehorn Thug: [holding up a bowling ball] "What the fuck is this?"
The Dude: "Obviously you're not a golfer."
-The Big Lebowski
The Dude: "Obviously you're not a golfer."
-The Big Lebowski
steveo
455 Posts
17 years, 8 months ago
HarryReems
Treehorn Thug: [holding up a bowling ball] "What the fuck is this?"
The Dude: "Obviously you're not a golfer."
-The Big Lebowski
So many in that movie...
"forget about the fucking toe"
"nice marmet"
"this aggression will not stand,man"
"toes across the line!"
I always thought THREE AMIGOS had some great lines in it. . .
HOT MEXICAN GIRL: "Well, we could take a walk and you could kiss me on the veranda."
DUSTY BOTTOMS (Chevy Chase): "Lips would be fine."
***and in ACE VENTURA (the first one)
Ray Finkel in drag as police detective: "How would you like me to make your life a living hell?"
ACE: "Well, Sarge. . . .I'm really not looking for a relationship right now"
HOT MEXICAN GIRL: "Well, we could take a walk and you could kiss me on the veranda."
DUSTY BOTTOMS (Chevy Chase): "Lips would be fine."
***and in ACE VENTURA (the first one)
Ray Finkel in drag as police detective: "How would you like me to make your life a living hell?"
ACE: "Well, Sarge. . . .I'm really not looking for a relationship right now"
This quote wasn't really very funny at all, but it taught me a valuable lesson.
"There are a million fine looking women in the world, dude, but they don't all bring you lasagna at work. Most of 'em just cheat on you."
-Silent Bob in Clerks.
"There are a million fine looking women in the world, dude, but they don't all bring you lasagna at work. Most of 'em just cheat on you."
-Silent Bob in Clerks.
dionne:"rough winds do shake the darling buds but thou eternal summer shall not fade" phat! did you write that?
CHER:DUH! its like a famous quote!
DIONNE:FROM WHERE ?
CHER:Cliffs notes
DIONNE:oh!
_ clueless ..classic!
CHER:DUH! its like a famous quote!
DIONNE:FROM WHERE ?
CHER:Cliffs notes
DIONNE:oh!
_ clueless ..classic!
I loved in the Big Lebowski when they make fun of Nihilism. That scene where the guy is passed out in the pool with sunglasses, wearing all black, with a bottle of whiskey floating next to him is great. "Oh, he's a nihilist."
People that get into that type of thing might point out that those who effectively practice nihilism in their own lives are incredibly active, life-affirming, vibrant people. Its still a funny joke though.
People that get into that type of thing might point out that those who effectively practice nihilism in their own lives are incredibly active, life-affirming, vibrant people. Its still a funny joke though.
"Shes a witch...may we burn her?" - Monty Python and the Holy Grail
"These amps go to eleven." - Spinal Tap
"Walk this way...walk this way." - Young Frankenstein
"See if you can guess what I am now...I'm a zit! Get it?" - Animal House
"These amps go to eleven." - Spinal Tap
"Walk this way...walk this way." - Young Frankenstein
"See if you can guess what I am now...I'm a zit! Get it?" - Animal House
hey kid stop looking up the ladies skirt plus cat on my head (Braincandy)
SPAM I HATE SPAM plus bring out your dead (monty python)
you so stupid (uhf)
you mess with the bull you get the horns ( Breakfast club)
ziggy piggy ( Bill and ted)
I cant think of anymore, I have to watch some movies
SPAM I HATE SPAM plus bring out your dead (monty python)
you so stupid (uhf)
you mess with the bull you get the horns ( Breakfast club)
ziggy piggy ( Bill and ted)
I cant think of anymore, I have to watch some movies
I think it went like this:
"Nice beaver you have there."
*passes fake stuffed beaver*
"Thanks, I just recently got it stuffed."
Naked Gun: Files from Police Squad!
That was funny:D
"Nice beaver you have there."
*passes fake stuffed beaver*
"Thanks, I just recently got it stuffed."
Naked Gun: Files from Police Squad!
That was funny:D
Willie: "Why don't you go take a shower?"
Dancer girlfriend: "I'm a dancer, I sweat."
Willie: "Well, you smell like a bum's nut sack."
-Bad Santa
Dancer girlfriend: "I'm a dancer, I sweat."
Willie: "Well, you smell like a bum's nut sack."
-Bad Santa
hmmmmm. . . interesting imagry there. . . . .
I'm, uh. . . gonna throw up now. . .lol
I'm, uh. . . gonna throw up now. . .lol
One that gets me everytime and made me almost choke the first time I heard it...
*Robin Williams throws a fruit at the back of the new guy his wife is seeing*
Mrs Doubtfire: "Oh terrible that happened dear I saw it all it was a run by fruiting"...
EMT
*Robin Williams throws a fruit at the back of the new guy his wife is seeing*
Mrs Doubtfire: "Oh terrible that happened dear I saw it all it was a run by fruiting"...
EMT
Not retro, but I think I'd like to include it, anyway:
"I'm Rainbow fuckin' Randolph!"
- Death to Smoochy
"I'm Rainbow fuckin' Randolph!"
- Death to Smoochy
"I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I'm not." -Kurt Cobain
Emtplatt
One that gets me everytime and made me almost choke the first time I heard it...
*Robin Williams throws a fruit at the back of the new guy his wife is seeing*
Mrs Doubtfire: "Oh terrible that happened dear I saw it all it was a run by fruiting"...
EMT
LOL! I LOVE that one...there are so many funny quotes from that movie...This one always cracks me up:
Mrs. Doubtfire: Oh I'm sorry, am I being a little graphic? I'm sorry. Well, I hope you're up for a little competition. She's got a power tool in the bedroom, dear. It's her own personal jackhammer. She could break sidewalk with that thing. She uses it and the lights dim, it's like a prison movie. Amazed she hasn't chipped her teeth.
*ROTFL*
steveo
455 Posts
17 years, 8 months ago
HarryReems
Willie: "Why don't you go take a shower?"
Dancer girlfriend: "I'm a dancer, I sweat."
Willie: "Well, you smell like a bum's nut sack."
-Bad Santa
Another from Bad Santa that cracks me up........
"Look, I've boned a lot of fat chicks in my time, sure. But, uh, as far as I can recall, I've never fornicated anybody."
MsEtCaHn
267 Posts
17 years, 8 months ago
Dark Helmet: Careful you idiot! I said across her nose, not up it!
Laser Gunner: Sorry sir! I'm doing my best!
Dark Helmet: Who made that man a gunner?
Major: I did, sir. He's my cousin.
Dark Helmet: Who is he?
Colonel Sandurz: He's an asshole, sir.
Dark Helmet: I know that! What's his name?
Colonel Sandurz: That is his name, sir. Asshole, Major Asshole!
Dark Helmet: And his cousin?
Colonel Sandurz: He's an asshole too, sir. Gunner's Mate First Class Philip Asshole!
Dark Helmet: How many assholes do we have on this ship, anyway?
Entire bridge crew stands up and raises a hand
Entire Bridge Crew: Yo!
Dark Helmet:I knew it. I'm surrounded by assholes!
Dark Helmet pulls his face shield down
Dark Helmet: Keep firing, assholes!
Laser Gunner: Sorry sir! I'm doing my best!
Dark Helmet: Who made that man a gunner?
Major: I did, sir. He's my cousin.
Dark Helmet: Who is he?
Colonel Sandurz: He's an asshole, sir.
Dark Helmet: I know that! What's his name?
Colonel Sandurz: That is his name, sir. Asshole, Major Asshole!
Dark Helmet: And his cousin?
Colonel Sandurz: He's an asshole too, sir. Gunner's Mate First Class Philip Asshole!
Dark Helmet: How many assholes do we have on this ship, anyway?
Entire bridge crew stands up and raises a hand
Entire Bridge Crew: Yo!
Dark Helmet:I knew it. I'm surrounded by assholes!
Dark Helmet pulls his face shield down
Dark Helmet: Keep firing, assholes!
nikki89
180 Posts
17 years, 8 months ago
At the moment my favorite line is, "Would anyone like a peanut?" from Shaun of the Dead. It's all in the delivery and context, though.
"Life of Brian" had some great quotes:
Brian: Excuse me, is this "The Judean People's Front"?
Greg: Fuck off! We're "The People's Front of Judea"!
Brian: You've got to think for yourselves! you're all individuals!
Crowd: We're all individuals!
One guy in crowd: I'm not.
Brian's Mother: He's not The Messiah, he's a very naughty boy!
Pilate: I have a wevy gweat fwiend in Wome named Biggus Dickus.
On a sidenote I've always found most of Vizzini's lines in "The Princess Bride" amusing:
Vizzini: I've hired you to help me start a war, it's a prestigious line of work with a long and glorious tradition.
Then, there's of course "Spaceballs" and Dark Helmet lamenting that he's always surrounded by assholes, but that one's already been mentioned.
Brian: Excuse me, is this "The Judean People's Front"?
Greg: Fuck off! We're "The People's Front of Judea"!
Brian: You've got to think for yourselves! you're all individuals!
Crowd: We're all individuals!
One guy in crowd: I'm not.
Brian's Mother: He's not The Messiah, he's a very naughty boy!
Pilate: I have a wevy gweat fwiend in Wome named Biggus Dickus.
On a sidenote I've always found most of Vizzini's lines in "The Princess Bride" amusing:
Vizzini: I've hired you to help me start a war, it's a prestigious line of work with a long and glorious tradition.
Then, there's of course "Spaceballs" and Dark Helmet lamenting that he's always surrounded by assholes, but that one's already been mentioned.
You know what they say: If you wanna save the world you gotta push a few old ladies down the stairs
