The Simpsons Quotes
    Close
    32156
      CALAMITY COYOTE:
      FurrBall And I Heard One Too!
      32155
        TAILS:
        I Always Remember Ecstatically Where I Was When That Guy Said Oh My God On TV.
        BART, LUIGI & STIMPY:
        Oh Yeah!
        32154
          HOMER:
          Tails Don't Do That! Your Hands Are Too Powerful!
          31657
            Ned Flanders:
            (Sighs as he looks at his picture his late wife Edna Krabappel) I sure do that laugh.
            Nelson Muntz:
            Ha-Ha! I miss her, too.
            31469
              Scott Christain:
              Hello, I am Scott Christain filling in for Kent Brockman tonight. Why did the clown cross the road? To arm-robbed at the Kwik-E-Mart. Full stories right after the commercial.
              Homer Simpson:
              Do you this guy in lunchbox?
              Bart Simpson:
              You mean Krusty the Clown? He is my idol.
              Homer Simpson:
              Maybe you should run off to bed.
              Scott Christain:
              Krusty the Clown is behind bars for a armed robbing a Kwik-E-Mart store.
              Bart Simpson:
              (Gasp and shocked) Krusty.
              Lisa Simpson:
              Oh no!
              Scott Christain :
              The reports was went to the cashier and grabbed the gun to threat for all the money in the paperbag....
              Patti ?:
              So the truth comes out.
              Bart Simpson:
              (Tearfully) Oh, Krusty. How could you?!?
              Marge Simpson:
              I know it's bad, But who know, Maybe he might turn out he is innocence all along.
              Homer Simpson:
              Earth to Marge, Earth to Marge, I was there. The clown is G-U-I-L-T-Y!
              31468
                FBI Troops 1:
                (Screams) COPYRIGHTED MATERIALS!!!
                FBI Troops 2:
                Don't look at it.
                FBI Troops 3:
                Somebody sell me a ticket.
                FBI CEO (Joe Biden):
                Bring some earmuffs and blind fold. We have been trained for this. (Shoots Homer's laptop with his gun, and the digital projector goes static and grabs Homer from climbing over the fence) From now on, Homer. The only place where you are ever going to see a movie without buying a ticket is jail!
                31382
                  KRUSTY:
                  So have a Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Kwaaaazy Kwanza, a Tip-Top Tet, and a solemn, dignified Ramadan. Now a word from MY god, our sponsor!
                  31381
                    Ned Flanders:
                    Feels like I'm wearing nothin' at all... nothin' at all... nothin' at all...
                    Homer:
                    Stupid sexy Flanders!
                    31380
                      Sideshow Mel:
                      My childhood has been un-ruined!
                      Joe Biden:
                      Listen up you freaks, You are all in violation of title 17 of the U.S. Copyright Code.
                      Chief Wiggims:
                      Take it easy, They were just watching a movie. (The FBI Troops grabs Chief Wiggims' arm) Hey, My badge is poking at my chest.
                      31007
                        Marge:
                        Did you know what yesterday was?
                        Homer:
                        Sure! Happy Anni-birth-intine's-Shark week?
                        30699
                          Jeremy Freedman:
                          "Why did they have to cancel Futurama?!?"
                          15795
                            Homer: "Hi."
                            Lenny: "Hey, look! Homer has one of those robot cars!"
                            *Crash*
                            Carl: "One of those *American* robot cars."
                            15794
                              Homer: "*shrieking as he displays his swollen butt* The bee bit my bottom, now my bottom's big!"
                              15793
                                Homer: "This is Ned Flanders, my friend!"
                                Lenny: "What did he say?"
                                Carl: "I dunno. Something about being gay."
                                15792
                                  What are you cackling at fatty! Too much pie that's your problem!
                                  -Grandpa Simpson-
                                  15791
                                    Don't eat nothin' four a couple of days because I'm taking you out for a steak the size of a toilet seat.
                                    -Moe-
                                    15790
                                      Stupid gravity.
                                      -Homer-
                                      15789
                                        "We are the mediocre presidents you won't find our faces on dollars or on cents. There's Taylor, there's Tylor, there's Philmore and Hayes. There's William Henry Harrrison, "I died in 30 days."
                                        -Springfield Elementary Students-
                                        15788
                                          Bart: Remember when we took those hypnotism classes to help us ignore Grandpa?
                                          Homer: I'll say I do, five years later and I still think I'm a chicken. I'm a chicken Marge!
                                          15787
                                            Homer: Awww twenty dollars, I wanted a peanut.
                                            Homer's Brain: Twenty dollars can get you lots of peanuts.
                                            Homer: Explain.
                                            Homer's Brain: Money can be exchanged for goods and services.