Stretch figures of yesteryear
Stretch Armstong toys from the 70's to early 90's
Wow, what a ride this figure has been on.
I remember the very day that I unboxed that Ninja Stretch Armstrong figure back in 1995, and thought 'what the hell is this crap inside him?'
I was not however the kind of child that would tear the thing open and find out what it was that made him stretchy. All I was concerned with, is how far I could stretch the thing and whether or not it could wrap around my sisters face.
Anyway, lo and behold he eventually became too worn to be played with anymore, too many Band-Aids covering the pinholes on his extremities that allowed the corn syrup to leak out. And alas, he was retired to the land of smashed up Tonka trucks and blown up Weebles.
But now, I am older, and more restectful of the finer things in life, namely classic toys.
I have spent the better part of 10 years trying to find that toy again, and at last was graced with its presence on ebay for a mere $175. I know some of you may be thinking thats a lot of money to spend on a corn syrup filled homoerotic doll, but I assure you, this toy goes for upwards of $300. And believe you me, they are well worth it.
Another great piece of Stretchy History would have to be Vac Man, Stretch Armstrongs arch nemisis.
Unlike the corn syrup filled good guys, Vac Man was filled with pieces of dried corn cob, and came with a pump to suck all the air out of him. At which point the toy could be stretched to 3x it's oringinal size. Great piece of action fun I tell you.
But I digress. The main focus of this article should be the stretch figures of the late 70's, the ones that fetch upwards of $10,000. Those are the true masterpieces.
For instance, the dreaded Stretch X-Ray figure with seethrough body and visible organs.
Or the fabled FrankenBumps figure that never made it to shelves. Not to mention Stretch Monster, who had several names from around the globe, and quite possibly the most important figure in anyones stretch collection.
Well, I feel that I have rambled enough in regards to these toys of yesteryear. I hope to bring back fond memories of all those that cut open their Stretch Armstrong figures and discarded his loose flesh like some piece of peeled fruit.
Just think about how much money was thrown away.
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