What the Pros expect...

Here are some handy tips on writing a professional article.

I'm sure a lot of you know me. I am dalmatianlover; I've been a fellow Retrojunk member for two years, and I've written some of the most popular articles (but not the most) on this site. By the way, this is based on other people's opinions; I'm not just patting myself on the back or anything like that.

After writing 40 articles, I've learned a lot of things about what people like to get out of articles. Some people, on the other hand, have different things that they're looking for. Knites wrote his own article on this topic, and after all the criticism I've been getting for these past two years, I thought I'd give out some tips for professionalism for those of you who are new to writing. This is all based on my experience.

Part I - Building Your Article

What's the first thing you need to know before making your article? Well, knowing how to make it, of course. To start things off, here are some things you should consider while writing the article:

1. Pictures

The key thing to a good article is to include lots of pictures. It makes the article more enjoyable to read. No article gets sent to the back page faster than an article with a lack of pictures. If your article has no pictures and bulked out paragraphs, readers will get bored, get eye aches and complain. Though, I gotta admit, these complaints I keep hearing about lack of pictures do get on my nerves. These guys sound like little kids when they read novels: "There are no pictures!" You remember those days?
Also, when you put your pictures in the article, make sure you're putting them in the right place. Avoid poor picture placement, as it can really annoy readers and prove your inexperience as an article writer. If you need any help on alignment, take a look at the tag cheat sheet; that's what it's there for.

2. Spelling and Grammar

This really gets on people's nerves. Before posting your article, make sure everything is spelled correctly, you're using proper grammar, and that you are writing in complete sentences. A good way to do this is to copy this onto Microsoft Word, and it'll point out all the misspellings and grammatical errors you have made as well as fragments you have written. A fragment or two isn't too bad for an article, but try to avoid using fragments too often. Also, make sure that you use CAPITALIZATION and punctuation...whenever necessary.
Another thing that you should consider is to keep your profanity to a minimum. An overuse of profanity can really irritate people, and it will also show to them that you are nothing but an immature brat with no professionalism whatsoever. I always try to keep my profanity to a minimum since I tend to have this fear of getting banned from the site.

3. Research

Professionals demand articles that are well-researched. If your article contains low content or is poorly-researched, you will very likely get a lot of bashing from people who read the article. I should know because I have written numerous articles and have gotten a lot of feedback from people proving either my information was wrong or that I left something important out. If you want to talk about something but have a lack of knowledge from it, then do some serious research. Wikipedia would be my recommendation.

4. Remember the Purpose of "Retro"

Remember: This is Retrojunk. Retrojunkies want to read articles on something that'll tickle their memories. Right now, the site only focuses on the 1970's, 1980's, and 1990's, but I'm pretty sure that the first decade of the 2000's will be added on here shortly since it's almost over now. You can write an article on anything you want, but try to make sure it's retro enough. If what you want to talk about is fairly recent, that's fine, but keep in mind that it might get sent to the back pages since readers may feel that it isn't retro enough.

5. Be Original!

When writing your article, make sure that it is written in your own words. Nothing seems to piss people off more than people who quote the Angry Video Game Nerd. I admit, some of my articles sounded similar to stuff that he had said, but I've been accused of "ripping him off" or "quoting one of his videos word for word and claiming it as my own", which is entirely...

If you want to use the AVGN as a reference, that's fine, but try to formulate what you're saying into your own words; there are tons of AVGN fans on the Internet, and they can clearly tell if someone is quoting him. If you are accused of ripping him off, it's best to ignore that comment, because the fact that you're quoting somebody is not the point of your article anyway.

Part II - Topics to Avoid

Now, before I go on with this, I need to say that there are some types of articles that we get a lot of on Retrojunk. Some people like these articles, but most get annoyed by them. If your article falls into one of these categories, people will like them, and people will hate them. I'm not saying "Don't make these articles"; I'm just informing you that we get a lot of articles like these, and if your article doesn't fall into one of the following categories, it might get better appreciation.

1. Video Game Articles

These types of articles tend to get lots of appreciation. A lot of children of the 80's and 90's lived on video games, and classic video games always seem to tickle their memory. If you are going to make a video game article, make sure it has lots of pictures and talks about a good variety of games. I tend to like list articles, but small lists don't amuse me that much. Professional writers do get sick of these articles, so try to keep stuff like this to a minimum.

2. Nickelodeon's Glory Days

This is a very broad topic. Everybody was born in a different year, and everyone lived in a different generation. Talking about the "glory days" of Nickelodeon could mean any era. There are people who liked the network better in the 80's before it went commercial. There are people who liked the network better in the early to mid 90's when it showed the classic Nicktoons. Then, there are people today who like Spongebob and the Fairly Oddparents. Over the years, Nick has changed making shows for new generations of kids. Making an article like this will cause many to disagree with you. If you're going to make an article like this, then my best suggestion to you would be to come up with a better title.

3. My Favorite Crushes

There was a time period where I saw a series of articles like this. We got like four of them in a row! People make these articles that list like girls or cartoon characters from the 80's that they had crushes on. I mean, it's nice that you had a crush on them, but that's not really a topic I'd be interested in. Articles like this show another good example of immaturity.

4. Decline of...

I've seen quite a few articles like this, and I just didn't get them. I mean, "Decline of Family Guy", "Decline of Teletoon", etc., etc. These are basically articles that talk about how something went downhill. Most of them got sent to the back page because most people disagreed with them, plus they had a major lack of research and a lot of immature statements. If you so choose to make an article like this, make sure it is well-researched, is professionally-written and doesn't include the "Decline of" part in your title.

5. Top 10 Lists

Now, personally, I like these types of articles. I think they're very interesting, and when I read them, I get to know a little more about people. Professional writers, on the other hand, can't stand these kinds of articles. Top 10 List articles (or any kind of list article for that matter) show a true amount of laziness to the pros. I, on the other hand, encourage people to write these kinds of articles so that I can get to know about them better, but be prepared! People who comment on these kinds of articles may disagree with some of the stuff you put on your list, and others may question why something was left out. Believe me; people like to complain. I learned that from the Angry Video Game Nerd as well.

6. TV Sucks Now!

This is probably the most annoying topic of all. People keep complaining about how TV sucks these days. To be honest, it doesn't really suck; this is just TV for a new generation audience. People make these articles because networks like Nickelodeon and Cartoon Network have gone down the drain by cancelling their classic shows and making new shows that aren't captivating as much to most audiences, and networks like Toon Disney have been overcompensated by things that don't belong on the network like Jetix. The main reason people hate these articles is because the people who write them are whining, using too much profanity, not spelling words properly, and not giving any valid explanation as to why the networks suck. I've written an article like this myself, and it's probably the only one of these articles that's really worth reading as it may be the most professionally-written of the "TV Sucks Now" articles. http://www.retrojunk.com/details_articles/2016/
Spongerocks wrote a whole article on this whole deal as well, and I find it to be worth reading as well.
http://www.retrojunk.com/details_articles/2210/

Part III - Accepting Criticism

Everybody loves to be complimented on their work, but there are some people who will critique on your work. Professionals like to read criticism as it helps them to become better writers. Here are some examples of members of Retrojunk you should focus on:

Knites

Knites is probably a perfect example. He knows just how to make a Retrojunk article be a success. He, himself, wrote an article that gave a lot of helpful tips on how to write a good article. Yes, I admit, I was inspired by his article to write this one. If you'd like to read it, it could be found here: http://www.retrojunk.com/details_articles/2060/

Velcrohead

Velcrohead is a true professional writer, and he can't stand amateur articles. He is kind of a bugger though, because he reads every single article that gets posted on here, points out every little flaw in it that he can find and posts it in the comments. He may sound like an asshole at times, but he offers good criticism. Reading his comments can give you a good idea on what professionals expect out of you. Although, there are plenty of people that despise him. I admit, I happen to be one of them. He's still got to learn that the reason we write Retrojunk articles is to talk about stuff we loved as a kid, not to win an essay contest! Still, keep an eye open for that name and that familiar avatar, and be prepared for some strong criticism.

Mrbumpy

Some commenters can get really nasty. This is a good example of someone who gives bad criticism. When I say bad criticism, I mean comments like "YOU SUCK!" and "This article stinks!" These examples are unconstructive, unhelpful, and give no detail whatsoever. Why I'm using mrbumpy as an example is because there have been several articles where people listed all their favorite cartoons from like the 80's and 90's or something like that. Mrbumpy normally commented on them by simply saying, "You have no taste." That's a perfect example of bad criticism! Mrbumpy is somebody I wouldn't want to hang out with; he hates "101 Dalmatians" and everything to do with the 80's. I don't know what kind of stuff he does like, but just saying, "You have no taste" to people and nothing more is completely pointless and unconstructive. If you see comments like these, ignore them. These come from people who are total jerks who just need to grow up.

So, in conclusion, I hope this article was informative to a lot of you fellow writers. I know, this was probably pointless, and it'll probably get sent to the back page, but I just thought I'd do it since it's something I've learned from my writing experience, and I wanted to do something different for a change. If you think this is just a rip-off on Knites' article, just deal with it.

Peace,

dalmatianlover

Comments

you forgot to mention in the pictures part that people should refrain from cluttering too many pictures together

I liked the motivational office pictures.

Hmm, well, even though Knites seems to be on haitus, I enjoyed his article more. And yes, you have done a lot of video game articles and top 10 lists. And wasn't that "WROOONG" image in his article? =/ I didn't like you calling out names; velcrohead can be a jerk but he can offer pretty good criticism (too bad he's gone now).

I'm gonna have to give this one a thumbs down.

Huh. It seems I took a sabbatical from this site far too early.

All I have to say is this: DalmatianLover, you are a fantastic cunt. Nothing I could say could equal the shame that your inadequacies no doubt bring upon you on a daily basis. I couldn't punish you any worse than that.

Do you seem to notice you contradict a lot of the stuff you say and claim. You claim that video game and top 10 articles are avoidable topics, but you did some articles on these topics after this article. You claim that you can deal with criticism, but from your ego trip article, it really shorts that you can't

Sorry, but thumbs down from me.

Do you actually read what Velcrohead is saying? He's not doing this to hurt your feelings. Criticism is needed to make your work better. If you can't handle criticism, don't write an article for this site.

I'm personally sick of the top 10 lists and TV sucks now articles, why not do something ORIGINAL. Most of the time, the people writing these articles rarely elaborate. All they do is rant about how bad things are now or whatever.

Anyways, I think the article from Knites dealing with this subject is much, much better. It didn't call out people or talk down to people like they are idiots. Thumbs down all the way.

"Just so you'd know, I write articles for the sake of sharing my childhood, not to gain respect or anything of some kind."

Well there's certainly nothing wrong with that. It's the same reason anyone writes an article here. It doesn't matter if a particular article doesn't meet your criteria of "what is good".

One last coment and then I'll shut up. Okay actually two.

1. If you actually ever LISTENED to Velcrohead's comments, you'd remember that the one thing he tells EVERYONE is that after writing an article sit on it for a few days before submitting it, it gives you time to decide whether it was shit or really good, if it needs work or is perfect as it is. If you actually had followed this advice, and had only written this article to vent, after a few days you'd have realized it was going to get a horrible response. So you either submitted it immediately after writing it, and failed to follow Velcrohead's most basic and useful advice, or you did it deliberately to stir up shit and be controversial. Eitherway you really managed to come across like a jerk.

2. I don't understand how you could read this article and NOT think you sound like you're patting yourself on the back. You say that people think you're the best article writer on the site twice and use your own article as an example of the best "tv sucks now" article around. The fact that you have to reference your own greatness is what makes you sound so arrogant. Just because you say "not to pat myself on the back" doesn't negate that, instead it reinforces it.

3. Okay so I lied, three comments. This one isn't directed at Dalmationlover, but rather at the entire Retrojunk community at large. Before Arbbal lost me with their argument that bad spelling and or grammar should be acceptable (to note, nobody on retrojunk cares if you spell "color" "colour" but we have a major problem with sentences like this: "teh nitendo iz kewl" those are the spelling mistakes we cannot abide), they brought up a very good point. Just because a poorly written article has lots of pretty pictures, we should really stop rating it so highly! An article should NOT have to have pictures AT ALL if its written well enough. I have a blog (and yes, I'm patting myself on the back) where I review a tv show. I have a very high readership (for what it is) and NEVER post pictures. When I wrote the three articles I've done so far, I regretfully went out and found a bunch of pictures, since I knew that nobody would bother with it unless it had lots of pretty pictures. That sucks! We really, as a group, need to stop this insanity! If an article is well written and entertaining we shouldn't care about the lack of pictures! Come on now!

And I'm done.

I don't think Wikipedia should be considered a serious research source since anybody on the Internet can edit the articles. That's the primary reason my grad school does not accept Wikipedia as a valid reference.

I haven't seen much of Mrbumpy but Knites and Velcrohead seem to leave good comments. How many articles have absolutely nothing to criticize? Retrojunk is entertaining and most of the articles I've read have been fun, but there's always ways to improve even in a more casual environment. You're putting your work out for everyone to see, don't you want to do your best?

I don't think Top 10s whatever lists should be avoided because I think its nice to know someone else's perseption on a topic. Think of it as a loterry, we all can't dream up the same numbers.

As for "(insert topic

Sucks Now" articles, PERSONALLY I don't mind them, because my parents (or grand-parents) would say the TV shows/movies/music they grew up with were better than mine. Well, aren't we all being quasi-grandpa/ma-when we write such articles?

Because if we weren't, then define "Retro".

"Sad to see elitist internet warriors shitting all over RetroJunk. Seriously, dalmationlover, stop posting. You're no professional writer, and it shows."

Just so you'd know, I write articles for the sake of sharing my childhood, not to gain respect or anything of some kind.

If you're not new to writing, please disregard this article. I promise you this next article I submitted will be an improvement.

Stop it! Stop it now, all of you! Just send this article to the back page, and let's drop this whole thing!

Yeah, this whole article reeks of arrogance... ugh. Thumbs down.

To dalmatianlover:

What I quoted from you is proceded by a -

-I don't know where the hell you got that idea, Arbbal. Most of the stuff you listed I don't recall ever putting into categories like those. I don't even know what "Decline of" articles are all about anyway.

Look I can call an orange a nut but it doesn’t change the fact that it’s a citrus. Since you don’t know what “Decline of” articles are about here it is. A “Decline of Article is when someone says, “X used to be good. Here is why. X now sucks for these reasons.” Sometimes people even skip the whole X used to be good part and go right on to why it sucks. In all the articles I listed of yours as a “Decline of “ article you complain about the way things are now. Hence they are “Decline of Articles”. Also articles can fit in more than one category. If you’re writing about the decline of Nickelodeon, it is both a “Decline of “ article and a “Nickelodeon’s Glory Days” article as you should mention how good it was before you say why it sucks. Then it is also a “TV Sucks Now” article since Nickelodeon is a TV station. Your article Top Ten Hardest NES Games was both a “Top Ten” article and a video game article.

-And you all obviously didn't read my article carefully enough. I did NOT say "Don't make these articles" or "It's alright to make these articles but no one else."

I did. You said that they are “Topics to Avoid”. Also you said (and I am paraphrasing) there are a lot of them and people get annoyed with them, although a few people like them. But, that doesn’t matter and you should write something else that’s original. Yet as I demonstrated with the list of your articles you’re one of the major contributors of said bad choice articles. It’s the whole do as I say and not as I do. There is a word for that it’s called hypocrisy. That’s part of the mastery of a language people often forget. There is more to it than just proper spelling and punctuation. You also have to be able to convey a message clearly. If you meant something else then you failed. Because the message was don’t write these articles, and it doesn’t matter how many disclaimers you throw in. Once I found you were also guilty of writing said articles yourself all I heard was, “Blah, blah, blah I’m a hypocrite.”

- I hate to tell you this, Arbbal, but I think you just made a complete fool out of yourself with that comment you just made.

I don’t believe so. If you read the comments everyone else has made you’ll find that the great majority of readers think of you as the fool. You’ve lost almost all credibility on this site. I never had much respect for you in the first place as all I ever really saw was bashing other people’s hard work. Once again, pieces that they took time out of their busy lives to write something for your enjoyment. Even though they didn’t have to. Even though they didn’t get compensated for it. And how did you repay their kindness? By telling them how much they suck. The only reason I did have any respect for you was because every once in a while you’d write something that make me smile. Now that you’ve shown you are a hypocrite as well I have no respect for you. So go ahead and call me a “complete fool” or any other names you can think of. I don’t care. With zero credibility and respect you opinion means less than nothing to me.

Sad to see elitist internet warriors shitting all over RetroJunk. Seriously, dalmationlover, stop posting. You're no professional writer, and it shows.

when did this website become a proving ground for literary snobs? i'd be happy if you'd all just stow your ego driven opinions about which type of articles suck and which ones don't.

"Too many people say an article's good on this site when in reality it really is an awful waste of time."

For serious. I think some people don't actually read the articles. They see a picture of something they liked in years past and then rush down to the comment section to say "OMFG I LOVED _____ WHEN I WAS A KID GREAT ARTICAL." Most of them spell "article" that way, too-- for whatever reason. O_o

I'm anxiously awaiting Velcrohead's response. He may be an asshole, but he's my kind of asshole. Too many people say an article's good on this site when in reality it really is an awful waste of time.
As for Knites' article, since I read his first and he made the bad article writers sound like Bizarro, he got a thumbs up. However, you got one as well only for the fact that you started off your "Accepting Criticism" section with a picture of Putin. Nicely done.

I don't know where the hell you got that idea, Arbbal. Most of the stuff you listed I don't recall ever putting into categories like those. I don't even know what "Decline of" articles are all about anyway. And you all obviously didn't read my article carefully enough. I did NOT say "Don't make these articles" or "It's alright to make these articles but no one else." I hate to tell you this, Arbbal, but I think you just made a complete fool out of yourself with that comment you just made.

Anyway, back on topic. I really apologize for making this article. I was just really mad at velcrohead for getting on me about professionalism, and it sounded to me like he was trying to get me to be someone I'm not. I know this article sucks, and I don't want to hear any more "Knites already did an article like this, and it's way better" comments. I also don't know why you guys think I'm patting myself on the back or praising myself. I happen to have a lot of fans, but do I think I write the best articles? No. I know there are plenty of people who are better than me. Take Spencer, for instance, the guy who writes the "Retro Machine" articles. Those are definately the best articles on Retrojunk.

You guys won't need to bitch about this article much further because I submitted another article recently, and it's nothing like this one. It's going to be on a retro topic, and it's not going to be a list article or a video game article, and there will be plenty of point to it. That's all I gotta say for now.

We already had the article by Knites and that one was much better.

Compared to the articles you've written. I guess it's alright for you but no one else.

Part II - Topics to Avoid

1. Video Game Articles
Video Games on the BIG SCREEN!
A look at Sonic the Hedgehog
Sidekicks in the VG World
My NES Memories
Top 10 Hardest NES Games
Kirby's Most Memorable Games
Top 5 Genesis games to Avoid!
Video Games from the Vault!

2. Nickelodeon's Glory Days
My Thoughts on the Nicktoons

4. Decline of...
Cartoon Ranting
Cartoon Cartoons!
There's Nothing Good on TV!
My Thoughts on the Nicktoons

5. Top 10 Lists
Top 100 80's Movies!
Top 25 80's Cartoon Intros
Top 10 Rock Albums (90's)
Top 10 Rock Albums (80's)
Top 10 Rock Albums (70's)
Top 10 Hardest NES Games
Top 10 80's Animated Movies
Top 20 Greatest Songwriters
10 Worst Movies I've Ever Seen
Top 5 Genesis games to Avoid!
Top 10 Cartoons of my life

6. TV Sucks Now!
Cartoon Ranting
Cartoon Cartoons!
There's Nothing Good on TV!
My Thoughts on the Nicktoons

Im hoping my upcomong video game article is good

i cheecked my slpelling and thrwoing in pitcures lots adn lost of picturs and did reserck.

but seriously there will be loads of pictures in mine and most of them will be taken personally, not googled.

Because, if someone grows up using a diffrent language obviously their english isn't going to be as good as someone who grew up speaking it. English is one of the hardest languages to learn. It has so many rules about grammar and multiple time where they contradict other rules or just make exceptions. Then you have words like to, two and too. All pronounced the save with diffrent spellings and meanings. You don't see how that could be confusing to a primarily nonenglish speaker? Spelling has identical problems. The word is spelt through in some forms of englis and thru in others. Don't even get me started on pronunciation. So someone whats to share something with us all (doing us a favor, after all if people didn't write articles there wouldn't be much on this site.) and they get blasted for not using proper spelling or grammar. Hence discouraging them from writing. After all if you take time out of your life to write an article for other people's enjoyment and all anyone tells you is it's crap that doesn't make you want to write any more. Now immagine the same problem only your writing said article in a language you don't use regulary. As I said people need to stop being so elitest and quit whining.

I echo goblyn's comment.

Also, there really was no point to this article, since there was already one like it. Your tone comes off as snarky and arrogant, which I, for one, don't appreciate.

Some of us commenters may not be "professionals" as you seem to be fond of saying, but some of us have higher standards than others. Is that such a bad thing? If you can't take criticism, don't post on the internet.

I enjoyed this article and I don't think it's elitist at all to recommend one use the best spelling and grammar that one knows how. I don't see how anyone could infer from this article that non-English speaking people should be discouraged from writing articles.

i just wrote an article about blaming media for horrific events:such as the beavis and butthead fire incedent and the marylin manson colobine shooting.will that pass as rertro?

I think you're really starting to circle the drain on ideas for new articles. Stop trying to simply write as many articles as humanly possible and take the time to think up much more original subject matter. Focus on quality over quantity, just my two cents.

This was a good article, but you shouldn't mention names.

This is exactly why I'll never write an article for Retrojunk. So let's look at a few of your points.

Pictures: Pictures are nice and help break up a long article. Too often however, I've seen poor articles with many pretty pictures get praise over articles that are well written that have few. Why is this? It takes more work to write a quality article than to steal a bunch of pictures off people's web pages. Believe it or not there are still things that are hard to find decent pictures of. So are you saying that people shouldn't be able to write about these topics? Even with the articles that have many pictures it seems like people just recycle the same ones over and over. Finally pictures are copyrighted material. If you use a picture in your article and didn't get permission from the origional photographer or entity that holds the rights you are stealing. You can be held liable for copyright violations.

Spellin and Grammar: There are huge diffrences in both spelling and gramar rules in American English, Brittish English, and Austrailian English. Even though it is the "same" language. Now consider this; not everyone in the world speaks english as their primary language. Are you suggesting that these people shouldn't share their stories as well? This comes off to me as being incredibly elitest. Expand beyond you little place on the world and embrace others.

Topics to Avoid: We all can read I presume. If you see the article isn't something you're intrested in then don't read it. No one is forcing you to read something you probably don't like. People should be able to write about what ever they feel. Isn't the whole point of this site to share your memeories? Then why criticize what people are sharing?

Accepting Criticism: Here's a news flash for you. Not everyone is a professional writer, some people actually have real jobs. Just because someone wrote an article about something that 90% of people will remember and vote high on doesn't mean it's better than someone with an obscure article that isn't voted as high. Prople need to get off their high horses and learn that. Honestly the whole rating system needs to be put in the circular file. Like my Mom used to say, "If you can't say anything nice, then keep you f***ing mouth shut."

This was well written, good job D.L.

Is this pot calling the kettle black? You seem to mention quite a few things that an author shouldn't do, yet the self-proclaimed "best writer on the site" fails to take his own advice. I also have to remind you that although you do have a handful of popular articles, this DOES NOT make you a decent writer, especially not a "professional" one. Your use of the word "professional" to describe any writer on this website is misused. A professional writer earns a living by writing - none of the contributors to RJ are paid to do so. If you meant that these people write well or intelligently, why couldn't you just say so? Don't throw around words for the sake of scrambling for some sort of elitism - it's unappealing.

It seems like you didn't heed my previous suggestion, which was to look at a thesaurus. You are in dire need of one...I quote you:
"What's the first thing you need to know before making your article? Well, knowing how to make it, of course. To start things off, here are some things you should consider while writing the article: The key thing to a good article is to include lots of pictures. It makes the article more enjoyable to read. No article gets sent to the back page faster than an article with a lack of pictures. If your article has no pictures and bulked out paragraphs, readers will get bored, get eye aches and complain"
Are you kidding me? Please educate yourself on sentence structure and grammar before you being to even think you are close to being a "professional". You managed to use the word "article" 7 times in a baby paragraph. It becomes redundant and boring while making you like a fledgling.

Please do not use articles as a personal vendetta by calling out certain people who have critiqued your works. It's one thing to give credit where credit's due or to give an homage, but to bring in negativity is to make yourself look foolish. That, dalmatianlover, is UNprofessional.

Never EVER suggest or use wikipedia as the bible of information. Anyone can edit those pages - use other sources. Didn't they teach you that in English Comp?

To quote a Chinese proverb: "Full bottles are quiet; it's the empty ones that make all the noise." You never hear authors of truly good quality articles continually referencing themselves or patting themselves on the back. It doesn't matter if you attempt to make it less obvious when you say "I'm not just patting myself on the back" because you still are. You do this in practically every article. Not only is this a turn-off but if makes you look silly, especially since you are not the best at writing, which brings me to my next issue...

Why bother writing an article on "how to write" when there is already a beautifully well-written, well-discussed, and well-conceived one? Not only does yours pale in comparison to Knites', but he doesn't talk to the audience as if they are morons. You have to assume that the people reading your articles are somewhat intelligent but not necessarily well-versed on the subject. I can't help but think that you saw his article had a lot of votes and "Hey, I can do that!" you decided to do the same thing. If you must jump on a bandwagon, make something unique, discuss something NOT already mentioned. Thumbs down.

The above post is mine. Damn it!! I did it again!! >:-(

Nicly done! Love how you referanced Knites articule on the subject too.

My article was just focusing on how people say the kids networks suck. when people rant about Cartoon Network or Nickelodeon, I get annoyed, I don't get as annoyed when someone rants about Disney (the company) or MTV.

There are some good points about this article. I sort of wish it would have stuck to the subject of what articles *not* to write...because that is a definitive list of things everyone is tired of hearing.

Now, on the bad side, calling people out by name is probably a really, REALLY bad idea. And patting yourself on the back comes off as weak and makes us think you need people to stroke your ego.

My advice for the future: Just stick to the facts of the article and keep your personal opinions to yourself. Not because they offend me, but because you're just asking for a world of trouble.

Knites wrote a kinder and gentler piece on the subject. You've even used at least one of the pictures he has.

Just go easier and let people write what they want to write. For example, I do get tired of the "TV Sucks Now" articles, but at the same time, the beauty of this site is that each person can provide their own take on why they feel that way.

Knites got here it first and did it better. Thumbs-down.

Already on it's way towards the back page? I guess it's time for a new article.

....thumbs way up!!! dalmationlover,this is awesome! i agree with everything you wrote here, and i even think that this article is better than the knites version(which was still pretty good) i agree that you make the best articles on this site, so keep it up.

I think your article pretty well summed up my thoughts and I enjoyed reading. Great work!

Oh my god Dalmationlover! You're just asking for a huge fight with this article.

1. People may like your articles, but without fail, a casual browse of any of the comments on your articles will show that there are plenty of people out there who can't stand your articles. I don't have a strong opinion one way or the other, but I do have a major problem with you thinking you should be an authority on how to write articles.

2. Just to emphasize, most of the things you say people writing articles should avoid are things you yourself are guilty of. REPEATEDLY.

3. What is wrong with video game articles? My video game article had all good comments, the only sort of negative comment was from YOU, where you stated that you didn't understand why people like video game articles but hate tv sucks now articles, or something to that extent. In fact you seem to say the same thing in the comment sections about most of the recent video game articles. I don't think anyone here has a problem with video game articles, as long as they aren't lists of your top ten games, or very poorly written (much like any subject). In fact most people really like video game articles, including me. I really enjoy reading well written articles about old school gaming.

4. Please stop patting yourself on the back about your tv sucks now article, because frankly, its not that great of an article. Yeah, it might be one of the better articles on the subject on the site, but seriously, you lost all credibility right there when you pointed out how your article was the best researched on the site.

5. Honestly, if you hadn't lost credibility before this, you'd have lost it all when you started talking about how you should accept criticism and then move on to attack people on the site, specific people!

In all fairness, this was probably your best written article, from a stylistic viewpoint, but in all honesty you don't need to be telling anyone how to write articles. I'm not saying I would be better, but you don't see me writing an article about writing articles. I think Knites wrote the definative article on the subject, and we should leave it at that.

I hope you are prepared for lots of criticism, because I predict Velcrohead isn't going to take this lying down.

Thumbs way down.