Mrs. Doubtfire
Release: November 24, 1993
Release: November 24, 1993

Daniel Hillard likes to entertain children. His job is providing voices for cartoons, but when he disagrees with the image that the studio wants to convey to children, he's fired. It is also his son's birthday and feeling down and wanting to do something special for him, he throws a wild children's party. His wife, Miranda, comes home and finds the house in shambles. After everything settles, she tells him that they are on different paths and thinks that they should get divorced. Because he's unemployed the judge feels that it's best if he gets his life in order first, so he allows him to see his children just one day a week. But he can't bear to be away from them for so long, so when Miranda decides to hire a nanny, he alters the ad, answers it himself, and pretends to be Mrs. Doubtfire. Donning a disguise, he becomes the new nanny.

Cartoon Bird: "First law of animation is, you can't fall if you don't look down. Avery's law."
Added By: Totally_Tooned_In
Mrs.Doubtfire: "*after seeing Stu choking* Oh no I killed the bastard!"
Mrs. Doubtfire: "Sink the sub. Hide the weasel. Park the porpoise. A bit of the old Humpty Dumpty, Little Jack Horny, the Horizontal Mambo, hmm? The Bone Dancer, Rumpleforeskin, Baloney Bop, a bit of the old Cunning Linguistics?"
Stu: "Mrs. Doubtfire, please."
Mrs. Doubtfire: "Oh I'm sorry, am I being a little graphic? I'm sorry. Well, I hope you're up for a little competition. She's got a power tool in the bedroom, dear. It's her own personal jackhammer. She could break sidewalk with that thing. She uses it and the lights dim, it's like a prison movie. Amazed she hasn't chipped her teeth."
Daniel: "[German accent] Ja, my name is Ilsa Immelmann. And I want to know, how many children do you have?"
Miranda: "I have two girls and a boy."
Daniel: "Oh, a boy. I don't work with the males, because I used to be one. [Miranda hangs up the phone]"
Miranda: "Yikes."
Miranda: "Hello?"
Daniel: "AHHHHHHHH! Layla get back your cell! Don't make me get the hose!! *softer* Hello?"
Miranda: "hangs up quickly."
Miranda: "Hello, are you calling in response to the ad?"
Daniel: "Uh - huh"
Miranda: "Tell me, who was your previous employer?"
Daniel: "I was in a band, 'Severe Tire Damage.'"
Miranda: "In a band?"
Daniel: "I just want to know one thing. Are your kids well-behaved? Or do they need like, a few light slams every now and then?"
Miranda: "Umm, I'll have to get back to you."
Daniel: "Wow!"
Mrs. Sellner, The Social Worker: "Oh, by the way. Do you have any special skills?"
Daniel: "Oh, yes, I do. I do voices."
Mrs. Sellner, The Social Worker: "What do you mean, you do voices?"
Daniel: "[German accent] Well, I do voices..."
Daniel: "[as evangelist] Yes!"
Daniel: "[as martian] We've come to this planet looking for intelligent life. Oops, we made a mistake."
Daniel: "[as Russian immigrant] Happy to be in America. Don't ask for a green card."
Daniel: "[as monster] I want you in the worst way."
Daniel: "[as Groucho Marx] Well this is certainly a rough meeting and it's not going very well for me, I'll tell you that. [as Chico Marx]"
Daniel: "Hey boss, give her a chance. She's gonna loosen up any moment."
Daniel: "[as Sean Connery] Look at me right now, Moneypenny, I want to undo that bow and get to know you."
Daniel: "[as a used-car salesman] I'll be crazy to make a deal with you!"
Daniel: "[as Ronald Reagan] Nancy and I are still looking for the other half of my head."
Daniel: "[as Walter Brennan] This is it! Yes, I'm doing it! I'm sitting on a gold mine!"
Daniel: "[as Humphrey Bogart] Don't make me smack you, sweetheart. I'll do it."
Daniel: "[as Pudgie] Figaro!"
Daniel: "[normal voice] I do a great impression of a hot dog. [leans back straight, trying to keep a straight face]"
Mrs. Sellner, The Social Worker: "Mr. Hillard, do you consider yourself humorous?"
Daniel: "I used to. There was a time when I found myself funny, but today you have proven me wrong. Thank you."
Daniel: "Could you make me a woman?"
Frank: "Honey, I'm so happy! [hugs Daniel]"
Daniel: "I knew you'd understand"
Cop: "Ma'am, are you aware that it's against the law to possess animals of a barnyard nature in a residential area?"
Miranda: "What if you're married to one?"
Stu: "[at the pool] Your day's on me, Mrs Doubtfire. Anything you need, just put on my tab, okay?"
Mrs. Doubtfire: "Oh, thank you dear. [Stu leaves]"
Mrs. Doubtfire: "Touch me again, and I'll drown you, you bastard."
Jonathan Lundy: "Does your girlfriend have a girlfriend?"
Daniel: "Hey, it's the 90's!"
Daniel: "In the words of Porky Pig, Ya-ba-deeb-a-deeb-a-deeb-a-dee, piss off, Lou"
Mrs. Doubtfire: "He was quite fond of the drink. It was the drink that killed him"
Miranda: "He was an alcoholic?"
Mrs. Doubtfire: "No, he was hit by a Guinness truck"
Mrs. Doubtfire: "It was a run by Fruiting"
Mrs. Doubtfire: "The only thing you'll be watching from now on is deep CNN. Now, between the hours of 3 PM and 7 PM, I'm in charge. And when I'm in charge, you will follow a schedule. Those who do not follow the schedule will be punished. -Mrs. Doubtfire"
Mrs. Doubtfire: "Just became a woman and I'm already going through hot flashes. -Mrs. Doubtfire"
Mrs. Doubtfire: "Euphegenia Doubtfire dear, I can Hip Hop, Be Bop, and yo yo myself I mean cuppa cocoa! -Mrs. Doubtfire"
Bossy Nanny: "I do not clean windows, I do not cook meals, I do not take phone calls, I do not read stories, and most of all... I DO NOT CHANGE DIAPERS! -Bossy Nanny"
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