Small Town Schoolteacher Samantha Caine Has Had Amnesia For About 8 Years But After A Major Car Accident Her Memories Begin Flooding Back Mainly Of Once Being An Assassin For The C.I.A.
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Complaint Department Lady:"Complaint Department."
Megan Marples:"Hello, my name is Megan Marples, that is. And this is my dog, Sniffles."
Complaint Department Lady:"Is that your complaint?"
Megan Marples:"Why, no it is not! You see, I bought this hat and it has a hole in it. Observe the whole."
Complaint Department Lady:"[grabbing dog] Well, this is the weirdest hat I've ever seen."
Megan Marples:"No, no, no, no. That is my dog. This is my hat."
Complaint Department Lady:"[placing dog on head] How's it look?"
Megan Marples:"Well, it looks like you have my dog on your head."
Complaint Department Lady:"I feel pretty."
Megan Marples:"Okay, as I was saying. This hat has a hole in it."
Complaint Department Lady:"...Whatcha doin'?"
Megan Marples:"Complaining."
Complaint Department Lady:"May I hear your complaint?"
Megan Marples:"Well, I sure as heck hope so! This hat has an unwanted hole in it!"
Complaint Department Lady:"[opening dog's mouth] Well, you're right. There's a hole right here! This hat is defective."
Megan Marples:"[throws dog down defective shoot]
No, that's my dog!"
Complaint Department Lady:"[grabbing hat] Oh, and what a cute dog it is! Who's a cutie? Who's a cute little...
[checks under the hat]"
Complaint Department Lady:"boy? You are!"
Megan Marples:"You are loony!
[walks off]"
Complaint Department Lady:"Sir, you forgot your dog!"