Sausage Party Quotes
34575
Barry:
[last lines; to his friends] Guys! Oh, my God. You have to come with me right now.
34574
Barry:
The gods can be... [clears throat] Excuse me. [shouts heroically] THE GODS CAN BE KILLED!
34573
Brenda:
Yes! Our lives and our bodies!
34559
Ketchup:
(to Honey Mustard) What? What are you looking at?
34543
Potato:
[from the green band trailer, singing] The pipes, the pipes are call... [Potato's stomach gets sliced off] Ack! JESUS ME EYES! [Potato continues to get his skin sliced off] Oh! God, me skin! She's peelin' me skin!
Carl:
What...The...-
Cheddar Cheese:
[After a lettuce has his eyes gouged by Camille's thumbs as he gets torn apart, Cheddar Cheese being grinded by a shredder] NOOO! DON'T!
Baby Carrot:
RUN!
Camille Toh:
[notices the Baby Carrots are going to fall off the counter] Whoops. [Baby Carrots fall off the counter, she grabs them]
Baby Carrot:
I WANT MY MOMMY! [She eats the Baby Carrots]
Carl:
They are eating CHILDREN! THEY'RE JUST CHILDREN!
34542
Camille Toh:
[At Camille Toh's house, Camille enters her kitchen with bags of Groceries, humming. She places the bags on her kitchen counter and looks down at her Camel Toe then, she unhinges her Camel Toe] Oh shit, I really needed that Douche.
Carl:
Holy shit, we're actually here! C'mon, Barry, you're missing it man. Dude, get in on this shit.
Barry:
God, what have I done? Frank needed my help, but I wasn't there for him. After all the times he stood up for me, you know. God, I'm such a fearful coward. He'll never forgive me. I'll never forgive me.
Carl:
Look, Barry, the only way to respectfully honor Frank... is to completely forget about him.
Barry:
Oh!
Carl:
And hey for all we know, he's okay! He's probably heading back to our Aisle and he'll be here tomorrow. Just act happy, ignore your feelings. Come on, let's see that smile. [Barry begins to smile] Ah. I see that lip curling up. [Barry bares his teeth with a smile] Oh, there you go! Whoo!
Barry:
Yeah. Yeah, you're right. We're in the Great Be-friggin-yond. [whooping]
Troy:
[Camille Toh grabs the Sausage package] Get ready, boys! We's about to fill what we need to fills. [Camille Toh opens the package as Carl sighs loudly and dumps the sausages on the kitchen counter] Feel that breeze.
Barry:
Carl, do you feel that?
Carl:
This feels amazing.
Troy:
Ow!
Tortilla Chip:
[Camille Toh then opens a bag of Tortilla Chips and pours them in a bowl] Whoo-hoo!
Cheddar Cheese:
Oh yeah. [rubs his cheeks]
Barry:
We're out of the package.
Carl:
It's beautiful, man. It's just beautiful! [gaze upon the kitchen] I'm crying! I'm crying 'cause it's so pretty here!
Barry:
Stretch your legs with me, Carl. Just do it man.
Irish Potato:
[Camille Toh picks up an Irish Potato] Oh, ho, ho, yes. Yes! I'm the first to enter eternity!
Carl:
Oh! Potato, way to go buddy! That's my guy!
Irish Potato:
[The groceries watch as Irish Potato gets washed by Camille] Being bathed by the hands of a God. [Baby Carrots and the other foods cheer for Irish Potato then, he started singing] Oh Danny Boy, The pipes, the pipes are call... [Camille Toh slices his stomach off with a vegetable peeler then, he stopped singing] OH JESUS FUCK! [The groceries gasp] OH GOD, ME SKIN! SHE'S PEELING ME FUCKING SKIN!
Carl:
What...The...FUCK?!
Irish Potato:
[last words before his death] JESUS, YOU FUCKING WHORE! [Camille Toh opens the lid from a pot and a cloud of steam escapes] ME EYES! THEY BURN! [Camille Toh throws Irish Potato into the water and his cries are reduced to gurgling]
Italian Tomato:
[last words before his death] NO, PLEASE-A NO, I'VE-A GOT A FAMIGLIA! [Camille Toh slams the knife down on the Italian Tomato, slicing him in half]
Groceries:
[Screaming] [Camille then tosses four bacon strips to a pan full of boiling oil to fry them (with one's eye that violently popped) A lettuce has his eyes gouged by Camille's thumbs as he gets torn apart, a loaf of bread is being slice apart and a block of cheddar cheese is having his head grated]
Cheddar Cheese:
[last words before his death] NOOO! DON'T!
[Below the cheddar cheese are a bunch of Tortilla Chips screaming as shredded cheese falls on them]
Carl:
CHEESE! YOU DON'T DESERVE THAT! [Camille Toh places the bowl with the Tortilla Chips into a microwave, closes the door and they are microwaved alive with heated grated cheese as it burns through their cooked corpses. A wine bottle grunts in pain as his wooden cap gets pulled off by Camille and Wine splatters on Troy and two sausages behind her.]
Troy:
Oh no!
Buns:
[screaming]
Carl:
No! [Carl & Barry watch in horror as Camille Toh dumps a bunch of screaming Baby Carrots into a bowl but two miss]
Baby Carrot:
FOR THE LOVE OF SHIT, RUN!
[They begin to run]
Camille Toh:
[humming, then turns around and notices the Baby Carrots about to fall off the counter] Whoops! [The Baby Carrots jump off the counter, but Camille Toh catches them]
Baby Carrot:
[last words before her death] I WANT MY MOMMY! [Camille Toh puts the Baby Carrots in her mouth and starts chewing them alive.]
Carl:
THEY'RE EATING CHILDREN!!! FUCKING CHILDREN!!!!! [Sees an open window near the sink] WE GOTTA RUN!
Barry:
NOOOOOOOOO!!!!! [drops to the floor and curls into a ball, clutching himself] WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!
[Carl returns to him and picks him up]
Carl:
BARRY! [slaps him in the face] Snap the fuck out of it and RUN! [Carl pulls Barry with him and they make a dash towards the open window. They come to a stop when they reach the edge]
Carl:
Okay little buddy, jump on the count of three! [Barry nods] One! Two! Thre... Ugh...
Barry:
Carl?
Carl:
[Groaning] BARRY! BA-RRY!
Barry:
Carl to Bar what? What are you saying Carl? [A knife pokes through Carl's stomach] Whoa! Oh God, no! CARL!
Carl:
[Groans]
Barry:
Oh God! Carl! [The knife slices all the way up Carl] CAAAAAARRRL!
Carl:
[last words before his death] BAAAARRYYYYYY!
[Carl's body splits in two and falls back into the sink]
Barry:
Carl, dear sweet Carl! What have they done to you, Carl? No! [Barry looks up] WHOA! [He sees that Camille Toh is moving her knife towards him] No! No! No! [Backs away from the knife and falls off the window edge] NOOOOO! AAAAAHHHH!!!
34541
Ralph:
(to Brenda) What's up? I'm Ralph. Looks like this is happening, huh? Yeah, I've been working on my moves. Ever heard of the jackrabbit?
34540
Honey Mustard:
[last words before his death] You want proof? Talk to Firewater! That bastard bottle of booze seems to know what's going on.
34536
Sammy Bagel Jr.:
RUN FOR YOUR FUCKING LIVES!
34526
Brenda:
[first lines; to Carl] Yeah, right, Carl. You really think any of these buns are gonna line up to get filled by you? Here's my impression of that happening. "Um, oh, is he in there yet? Oh I can't feel him. I don't think he's in there. Oh, wait! He is!" It's so sad! I bet you jackrabbit for a quick 15 seconds... [blubbers wildly] and then you'd slump over. I mean, honestly guys, who in this package would ever let Carl get up in them? [a bun raises her hand] Roberta, put your fucking hand down. You're ruining my joke. [Roberta puts her hand down] See? Nobody! That's who!
34525
Frank:
Look, I'm sorry. I wasn't respectful of your believes and I acted like and I know all the answers. But, I don't. Nobody knows everything. But, what I do know is that together, we can fight these monsters and take control of our own lives!
34524
Frank:
Boo and yah, motherfuckers! Red White and Blue Day is tomorrow!
34458
Corn:
[singing] Dear Gods you're so divine in each and every way to you we pray,
Lettuce:
Dear Gods we pledge our love to you forever more,
Caramel Corn:
We always felt we had a special bond,
Lollipop:
Take us to the great beyond,
Foods in cart:
Where we're sure nothing bad happens to food,
Cheeses:
Once we're out the sliding doors things will all be grand,
Milks:
We will live our dreams together in the promised land,
Potato Chips:
The Gods control our fate so we all know we're in good hands,
Fruits:
We're super sure there's nothing shitty waiting for us in the great beyond,
Sodas and Chips in cart:
And every aisle thinks of something different,
Honey Mustard:
Holy shit I've been chosen,
Mayonaises:
And to this we all agree,
Honey Mustard:
Booyah bitches I'm outta here,
Country Cider:
Everyone else is fucking stupid,
Except for those who think like me,
Fudge Packed Cookies:
And me,
Peppers:
And me,
Teriyaki Sauce:
And me,
Zesty Mint Chicken Sauce:
Out there for an eternity we'll meditate how fucking great,
Earl Green Teas:
Out there we'll get to teabag every day and more (hip hip),
Olives:
We'll shove pimentos up our ass by Zeus,
Frankführer Sauerkraut:
Ve'll exterminate ze juice,
Und subjugate the whole damned great beyond. (HEIL!)
Frank, Barry, Carl:
[singing with the other sausages] In here, we keep our wieners in our packages. That's how it is.
Brenda:
[singing with the other buns] It sucks, but that's the way our butts keep fresh and pure. Baby, baby.
Frank, Barry, Carl:
But once we're out the doors, it's not a sin.
Brenda:
For us to let you slip it in.
Frank, Barry, Carl:
In other words, we finally get to fuck!
Brenda:
And love!
Frank, Barry, Carl:
And fuck!
Brenda:
And hug!
Frank, Barry, Carl:
And fuck!
Brenda:
And feel!
Frank, Barry, Carl:
And fuck!
Brenda:
And share!
Pumpernickel Bread:
The Gods will always care for us,
Cake Mixes:
They won't squeeze us out their butts,
All the foods at the checkout:
We cannot overstate how confident we are that
Our beliefs are accurate and
Nothing bad will happen to us in the great beyond! [stopped singing]
Honey Mustard:
It's my brown and yet at last! I'm going to the great beyond, motherfuckers!
34448
Lavash:
[to a Fat Man] You fuck with them?
Sammy:
You fuck with us, bitch!
34410
Firewater:
So, you have learned the terrible truth. Congratulations! Now keep it to yourself, or I'll slit your throat while you sleep. I swear to God.
34409
Gumball:
Come on, guys! It's us or them!
34408
Lollipop:
(in the style of Sylvester Stallone) Hey, what do you think? Should we do it?
34401
Frank:
You see? There is hope!
Licorice Rope:
Aw, not this guy. No one asked for an encore, asshole!
Frank:
No, no! Don't worry, I got it this time. This time it's gonna be good... Look, I'm sorry. I wasn't respectful of your beliefs and I acted like I know all the answers. But I don't. Nobody knows everything. But what I do know is that together, we can fight these monsters and take control of our own lives!
Brenda:
Yes! Our lives and our bodies!
Frank:
We need to unite and stop focusing on each other's differences. Especially in immature and outdated ways. We have to cooperate and... [notices the drugged shopper screaming]
Female Shopper #2:
DIE! [slaps a piece of pizza and smashes it against the window]
Frank:
Oh, no! Pizza! [Frank, Brenda, Barry and the others looked the drugged shoppers]
Alex:
[seeing all the food is alive] The food's fucking possessed!
Sandwich:
Oh shit! [Alex takes a sandwich and eats it]
Toilet Paper:
We're all gonna die!
Tickilish Licorice:
Oh God! Oh...
Male Shopper #2:
IT'S DEVIL FOOD! [rips the Tickilish Licorice]
Apple:
OH MY GOD!
Mariachi Salsa:
[running away] The sausage - he was right! They're EVIL!
34393
Announcer:
[from the trailer] Welcome, shoppers.
Camille Toh:
[looking at the list of food] Ketchup, Mustard, oh! Sausages and Buns.
34390
Frank:
[Frank, Carl, Barry and Troy notices that an evil manager named Darren comes to the Sausages and Buns bin] SHIT! It's the Dark Lord!
Carl:
Oh no! He's coming!
Old Pork Sausage:
No, wait! I'm still fresh, I swear! I'm still fresh! [Darren takes the screaming Old Pork Sausage and throws it away in the garbage]
Carl:
Did he see us?
Frank:
No way!
Troy:
We're fucked, bros!
Barry:
Oh God! No! Take anyone, but us! Please! [Darren takes the wrong Fancy Dogs]
Darren:
Fuck you, weenies. [throws a package of screaming sausages into the garbage can then, he sighs] Fuck, I hate this fucking job!