Family Guy Quotes
22671
Peter and his kissup:
Peter: I hate myself.
Kissup: I hate you too. You fat sack of crap!
-Peter and his kissup
22670
Stewie:
How positively delightful! It's like somebody stabbed Mr. Bubble.
-Stewie
22669
Quagmire:
Quagmire:Damn you guy's are boring me,all it's mind-less chatter that's what it is you know what i just gonna go back and rent a dirty movie!(grunts on the way out the door).
-Quagmire
22668
stewie:
Stewie:(singing the song cars in mix tape)Brian had sex with a retarded girl now he's taking Stewie to get some ice cream in his car
-stewie
22667
guy in store/chris:
Guy: hey kid! get that ham out your shirt
Chris: i don't have a ham
Guy: (lifting up shirt) Oh sorry... (yelling to friend) hey! it's just a fat kid... (talking to chris) want a candy bar?
-guy in store/chris
22666
Quagmire:
(singing) Giggety Giggety Giggety Giggety let's have sex!
-Quagmire
22665
Peter and Lois:
Peter: Kick, Joe, kick!
Lois: Peter, he's a paraplegic.
Peter: Well, that doesn't mean he can't hear. Kick, Joe, kick!
-Peter and Lois
22664
Peter:
(Peter and family at at an ice cream parlor)
Peter: Oh, Rum Raisin's my favorite!
(Peter licks his cone and passes out on a table breaking it in half.)
-Peter
22663
Lois and Peter:
Lois: You kidnapped the Pope?! Peter, this is the most reckless thing you've ever done!
Peter: C'mon, Lois. What about the time I was on that airplane?
(Flashback to Peter standing in front of an airplane's emergency exit door. It says "Do not pull.
-Lois and Peter
22662
Mr. Pewterschmidt:
Pah, gay marriage. Next thing you know they wanna vote!
-Mr. Pewterschmidt
22661
Loretta:
Shut-up and put some more of that sugar in my bowl.
-Loretta
22660
Peter:
You know for a large heavy-set black guy, Cleveland's got a cute little white ass.
-Peter
22659
Stewie:
Oh God! Oh it is so hard to find funny women, and you are hilarious...aahw, you're like a female Bonnie Hunt
-Stewie
22658
Mr. Pewterschmidt:
Pah, gay marriage. Next thing you know they wanna vote!
-Mr. Pewterschmidt
22657
peter ,brian:
Peter:Oh,Brian i feel horrible i put Lois in the hospital ,
and i lost the kids,this is turning out worst than stewie's Ipos
commercial.[song the warrior plays]
-peter ,brian
22656
stewie and brian:
brian:how will we get passed them?
stewie:oh i got these costumes to disguise us.
brian:you'd do anything to wear a dress would you.
stewie:here they come, kiss me!
brian:ok lets go...well are you comming?
stewie:oh yes...hey, great shot at the dark
-stewie and brian
22655
Stewie Griffin:
Damn you, damn the brocacoli, and damn the wright brothers!
-Stewie Griffin
22654
Meg:
I HATE YOU!!!!!!!!
-Meg
22653
Peter timer cheese guy:
Peter:Oh my god what a felling this is turning out better than the time i met timer the cheese guy.Timer:a hankerfor a hunk of a slammin slice of chunka a hanker for a hunk of cheese when you get up and go is get up and....[knocking on door]
Timer:Howdy
-Peter timer cheese guy
22652
niel and tom tucker:
neil: i got the coffee you wanted!
tom tucker:*spits out coffee* i thought i told you i wanted urine in my coffee!
-niel and tom tucker