The Tonight Show on WVTV in Location for Laughs
Taken from 1985 with the late Johnny Carson.
Quote O' Matic
Corn:
"[singing] Dear Gods you're so divine in each and every way to you we pray,"
Lettuce:
"Dear Gods we pledge our love to you forever more,"
Caramel Corn:
"We always felt we had a special bond,"
Lollipop:
"Take us to the great beyond,"
Foods in cart:
"Where we're sure nothing bad happens to food,"
Cheeses:
"Once we're out the sliding doors things will all be grand,"
Milks:
"We will live our dreams together in the promised land,"
Potato Chips:
"The Gods control our fate so we all know we're in good hands,"
Fruits:
"We're super sure there's nothing shitty waiting for us in the great beyond,"
Sodas and Chips in cart:
"And every aisle thinks of something different,"
Honey Mustard:
"Holy shit I've been chosen,"
Mayonaises:
"And to this we all agree,"
Honey Mustard:
"Booyah bitches I'm outta here,"
Country Cider:
"Everyone else is fucking stupid,
Except for those who think like me,"
Fudge Packed Cookies:
"And me,"
Peppers:
"And me,"
Teriyaki Sauce:
"And me,"
Zesty Mint Chicken Sauce:
"Out there for an eternity we'll meditate how fucking great,"
Earl Green Teas:
"Out there we'll get to teabag every day and more (hip hip),"
Olives:
"We'll shove pimentos up our ass by Zeus,"
Frankführer Sauerkraut:
"Ve'll exterminate ze juice,
Und subjugate the whole damned great beyond. (HEIL!)"
Frank, Barry, Carl:
"[singing with the other sausages] In here, we keep our wieners in our packages. That's how it is."
Brenda:
"[singing with the other buns] It sucks, but that's the way our butts keep fresh and pure. Baby, baby."
Frank, Barry, Carl:
"But once we're out the doors, it's not a sin."
Brenda:
"For us to let you slip it in."
Frank, Barry, Carl:
"In other words, we finally get to fuck!"
Brenda:
"And love!"
Frank, Barry, Carl:
"And fuck!"
Brenda:
"And hug!"
Frank, Barry, Carl:
"And fuck!"
Brenda:
"And feel!"
Frank, Barry, Carl:
"And fuck!"
Brenda:
"And share!"
Pumpernickel Bread:
"The Gods will always care for us,"
Cake Mixes:
"They won't squeeze us out their butts,"
All the foods at the checkout:
"We cannot overstate how confident we are that
Our beliefs are accurate and
Nothing bad will happen to us in the great beyond! [stopped singing]"
Honey Mustard:
"Kiss my brown and yellow ass! I'm going to the great beyond, MOTHERFUCKERS!"
Added By: Clint_Olson
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