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Stan: Oh My God, they killed Kenny. Kyle: You Bastards!
-Stan and Kyle BEEFCAKE!
-Cartman I'm not fat, i'm big-boned.
-Cartman Cartman, you're such a fat ass, that when people walk down the street they go, 'God dammt that's a big fat ass'.
-Kyle Kick the Baby.
-Kyle Cartman, you're such a fat ass, that when you walk down the street they go, 'God dammt that's a big fat ass'
-Kyle Hello there children.
-Chef I'm not fat, I'm festivally Plump.
-Cartman Timmy!!!
-Timmy Sweet!
-Kyle Screw you guys, i'm goin' home.
-Cartman Hooody hooo!
-Mr.Hankey AAAHHH, to much pressure!
-Tweek Chef: Hello there, children.
Stan: Chef, what would a priest want to put up my butt?
Chef: Goodbye.
-Chef & Stan I've learned something today...
-Stan or Kyle at the end of just about every ep Wow, what a great audience.
-Jimmy Stop screwing around. Ya'll screw around too much.
-Mr. Adler Whateva, whateva, I do what I want!
-Eric Cartman [Cops taking him away after a fight] For what? You're arresting me for what? I'm not allowed to stand up for myself? I thought this was a free country? Oh i'm sorry I thought this America. Sorry, I thought this was America.
-Randy Marsh Screw you guys im going home
-Cartman You wanna get high
-Towelie I love you guys
-Good Cartman [after being pulled over for drunk driving]
What seems to be the officer, problem?
-Randy Marsh Okay people. There's nothing here to see. Everybody move along.
-Officer Barbrady That does it! I am sick and tired of people making jokes about stuff that's going in or coming out of my ass.
-Eric Cartman Towelie: don't forget to bring a towel you might get swet in your eyes. Kyle:thanks Towelie: wanna get high Kyle: No!!
-Towelie and Kyle Stan: Oh my god! They killed Kenny" Kyle:(unenthussiastically) You bastard!
-Stan and Kyle but you guys cant get married...YOURE FAGS!
-Mr. Garrison respect my authoritah!
-Cartman Aww hamburgers...
-Butters Moooooooom?
-Cartman kenny's family is so poor they had to put up their cardboard box for a second mortgage!
-Cartman don't kick the baby
-Ike shut up fatass!
-Kyle mm'kay
-Mr.Mackey sucky sucky five dollar!
-cartman You Unbelievable Son of a Bitch...
-Kyle I wanna make love!
-Chef HHHHHHOOOOOOWWWDDDDEEEEEYYYY HOW
-Mr. Hankey why'd you do that children?
-chef I'm super! thanks for asking!
-big gay al Butter it's time to go!
Alirght Mom!
-Butter's Mom/ Butter It's coming right for us Ned!
-Uncle Jimbo Now let's all get together and we have to stop our moms cuz were gonna save Terrance and Phillip too cuz thats what Brian Boitano do and were gonna save Terrance and Phillip too cuz thats what Brian Boitano dooooo. Cuz that's what Brian Boitano do.
-Kyle, Cartman and Stan Alabama man.
-Some random commerical advertizer on the show Don't boss me around you f*cking jew i'll kick your ass.
-Cartman Damien: Everybody hates me. Mr. Mackey: What do you suppose that is. Damien: Because i'm the son of the devil.
-Damien and Mr. Mackey I want a goddamn cheeseburger with some goddamn fries you f*cking gooback.
-Stan O.K, by then.
-Officer Barbrady They took our jobs
-Rednecks Big floppy donkey dick
-scientist Cookie monster!
-Ike Oh dear, I shoudn't have ate the chile! *farts fire*
-Cartman Oh, my carrot cake!
-Big Gay Al Cartman: Mom, Kenny called kitty and dildo!!
Carman's Mom: I know a special kitty that's sleeping with mommy tonite...
-Cartman and his mom Cart man,you fat ass!
-Kyle SHUUUUUUUUUT UUUUUPPPPPPP,OR I'LL SHOOT THE BUNNY!!!!!!!!!
-Crazy Bus driver I am super-duper serial.
-Al Gore cartmansmom:eric isint fat hes just big boned kyle:then he must have a huge bon in his ass!
-cartman's mom and kyle Can I just have some Spaghetti-Os?
-Butters Save the whales mother f**ker.
-A.L.F. Member Suck my a**hole you stupid taco bender!!!
-Cartman himhmmmihmmmimm
-kenny No Cartman, I don't want to marry you. You're too young for me!
-Liv Kyle: I thought your mom was your dad 'cause we saw she had a penis Cartman: WHAT!!! you son of a bitch!
-Kyle and Cartman *studio crowd kills kenny*
man 1: oh my god...i found a penny!
man 2: you bastard!
-man to another man chef...your salty balls have brought me back to life!
-mr. hankey I cant whistle if I eat too many crackers
-Butters Stan theres just better things you could be doing on a Saturday than singing and dancing. You could be watching tv or laying in bed.
-Randy Marsh Women dont want to read about romance they want to read about big powerful shlongs!
-Mr. Garrison Evolution is a hair brained theory that says i'm a monkey, i'm not a monkey! i'm a woman!
-Ms. Garrison How would you like to suck my balls, Mr. Garrison!
-Cartman What the f*ck are stem cells?
-Kenny (sings) I love cheesy poofs, you love cheesy poofs, if we didn't love cheesy poofs we'd be lame.
-Cartman Ike made a neno
-Ike Cartman! Duhrrrrrrr!
-Cartman dont forget to bring a towel!
-Evil towlee kyle: what about you messege from god? cartman: oh, i am no afraid of him, he is a pussy! hey god, you know i was just kidding!
-Cartman and Kyle If you don't like american ways, why don't you just get out...
-Redneck You're breaking my balls.
-Cartman (Regarding women) I'm sorry, Wendy. I just don't trust something that bleeds for five days and doesn't die.
-Mr. Garrison I'm Professor Chaos, and you can be General Dissary.
-Butters My Precious..They took my precious..
-Butters i'll tell you what's wrong! i've been waiting 500 years to play the Nintendo Wii! and if i don't get to play real soon i'm gonna bust a nut!
-Cartman No, I wasn't in Vietnam. But sometimes I like to pretend I was.
-Mr. Garrison Tonight; on Cop Drama; on TV; They're gonna say: Sh*t
-Cartman howdy ho!
- mr hanky Cartman: " Mom kitty's being a dildo!" Cartman's mom:"well i know a certain kitty kitty that sleeping with mommy tonight" Cartman: "You better not lose that ticket kenny or else imma kick you in the nuts! (the nuts the nuts the nuts)" Scissor Me Timbers!
Mrs.Garrison Oh, yeah? Well at least my mom isn't on the cover of 'Crack whore magazine'! - Stan to Cartman Let this be our final battle... - Cartman to Kyle Whatever! I'll do what I want! - Cartman I'm not an R-tard - Randy Marsh CLOSE THE DOOR, I'M TRYING TO FREEZE! - Cartman Goodbye you guys. - Kenny You kiss just like my dad. - Mr.Garrison Cowabunga...Motherf**ker! - Bart Simpson to Cartman F**k off, you donkey raping, sh*t eater! - Cartman Butters: Are you sure this is a good idea?
Cartman: It's NOT a good idea, It's an AWSOME idea. MERRY CHRISTMAS CHARILE MANSON! - The Cartman family, Stan and Kyle Let me just get a little high. - Towlie Everybody, back in the pile! - Stan They took our jobs! Dey took yer jerbs! DERK ER DERRRR! - Angry workers GIVE THIS MONKEY WHAT SHE WANTS! - Mrs. Garrison Now I for one think that evoultion is a bunch of BULLCRAP! - Mrs. Garrison I HATE FAMILY GUY!!! - Cartman Cartman: "Mr. Garrison, what's 'Vietnam'?"
Mr. Garrison: "'What's Vietnam?'... A question that a child would ask, but not a childish question." Ms. Crabtree: "Okay, that does it! Y'all sit down, or the cute little bunny dies!" Mrs. Brofloski: "What, what, what?!" Butters: Hi Mom and Dad!
Butters's Dad: DON'T YOU HI MOM AND DAD
US YOU LITTLE PUNK!!!!
(Punch Sound)
Butters: Ow, Dad!
Butters's Mom: YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW
THE TROUBLE YOU'RE IN MISTER!!!!
(Punch Sound)
Butters: Ah! What did i do!?
What did i do!?
Butters's Dad: DO YOU THINK YOU'RE TOUGH
NOW!? ANSWER ME!!!!
(Glass Breaking)
Butters: Ahhh!
Cartman: (outside on a lawn chair) Oh man if i was older
i would totally start jacking off right now!
-Butters, Butters's Mom and Dad,
and Eric Cartman. Ike: No kick the baby Butters's Mom and Dad: your grounded "Eric your little friends are here."
"Mom they're not my friends."
"I think you should go outside and be with your friends Eric."
"But Mom I don't want to go outside with my friends."
"DON'T BE SO DIFFICULT ERIC!"
--Lianne and Eric Cartman Wendy! You didn't?
I told her..... DON'T F*CK WITH WENDY TESTABURGER!!
--Wendy Testaburger and Kyle Broflawsky
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