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'Call the sheriff.' 'OK. Sheriff.' 'No. On the phone.'
-Sam Drucker Hank Kimball Tomatoes are the dumbest of all plants. Did you know their IQ is hardly above what a 6-year old child's is?
-Mr. Kimball 'Why do you want to irritate your corn?' 'Irrigate. It means put water on it.' 'Won't that irritate it?'
-Lisa Douglas Oliver Douglas You mallet head!
-Oliver Douglas 'Mr. Ziffel, notice where your wife's standing? Under the mistletoe!' 'Why don't you mind your own business?'
-Ed Dawson Fred Ziffel Learning to like wallpaper is like pushing a purple straw hat through a keyhole.
-Mr. Haney New York is a rat race, and the rats are winning.
-Oliver
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