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Dad, didn't they invent Christmas tree lots so people wouldn't have to drive all the way out to nowhere & waste a whole Saturday?
-Russ They Invented them Russ, because people forgot how to have a fun old-fashioned family Christmas & spend money on dead over-priced trees that have no special meaning.
-Clark Griswold Ellen's mother : I hope you kids see what a silly waste of resources this was
Audrey: He worked really hard grandma Aunt Bethany: "is your house on fire clark?"
Clark: "no aunt Bethany" Clark: Aunt Bethany, would you say the grace please?
Aunt Bethany: Grace, didn't she pass away?
Uncle Lewis: They want you to say the grace. THE BLES-S-S-ING!!!! Clark: You smell something Eddie?
Eddie: Fried pussycat.
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