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Excuse me, I'd like to ass you a few questions.
-Ace's Butt Finkle is Rhinhorn, Rhinhorn is Finkle, that must mean Finkle is a Man!
-Ace Do NOT go in there. Whoo!
-Ace We're goin' downtown...
-Ace Like a glove!
-Ace Ventura Alrighty then!
-Ace Ventura Lovely party... pitty I wasn't invited.
-Ace How can I be getting zis vork done vit all all de shouting? Vat vit de shouting? *Who the hell is that?* **That's, uh...** Heinz Kissvelvet. You vant to talk to ze dolphin, you talk to me.
-Ace Ventura Warning! Assholes are closer than they appear!
-Ace 351! 351! ROVER SET! HIKE! HIKE!
-Ace I'm in pyschos-ville and finkle's the mayor!
-Ace Ventura That kind of surgery can be done over the weekend!
-Ace Ventura Sounds broken."
"Most likely just sign here here and here.
-Ace and the dog napper Yes Satin?" Oh I thought you were somebody else.
-Ace I'm looking for Ray Finkle (shot gun cocked at his face).. and a clean pair of shorts
-Ace Aguado(stepping on a Roach): Uh oh, a homicide! Solve that one!
Ace:Ha! Well first I develope a motive, the perp saw the size of the bug's DICK!!!, and became insanely jealous!
-Ace and Aguado Take care now bye - bye then. (door slams) LLLLoser.
-Ace That's why Roger Podacter is dead. He found Captain Winkie.
-Ace Ace Ventura:Like a Glove
-Ace Ventura Ace Ventura:Like a Glove.
-Ace Ventura Ace knocks on the door: What's the password?
Ace: New England Clam Chowder
Friend: is that the red or the white?
Ace: Oh, I can never remember that.........White?
-Ace and his friend Can you feel that buddy? Huh? Huh? I have excersised the demons, this house is clean
-Ace Detective Lois Einhorn: "How would you like for me to make your life a living hell?"
Ace Ventura: "Well, I'm not really ready for a relationship, Lois, but thank you for asking." Ace Ventura: "I'm looking for Ray Finkle."
*** Cue ball from pool table narrowly misses Ace***
Ace Ventura: "That would be a scratch." Lois Einhorn: Ventura, when I get out of that bathroom, you BETTER be gone.
Ace Ventura: Is it number one or number two? (throws hands up) I just want to know how much time I have. Dan Marino: Hey Ace, got any more of that gum?
Ace Ventura: That's none of your damn business and I'll thank you to stay out of my personal affairs. Ace Ventura: That's why Roger Podacter is dead. He found Captain Winkie!!!! Aguado: Is everything all right in here? I thought I heard a commotion.
Lois Einhorn: Everything's fine seargeant.
Aguado: You want me to throw him out?
Lois Einhorn: Why don't you throw yourself out?
Aguado: Yes, maaam. Aguado: Homicide, Ventura. Now how ya gonna solve that one?
Ace Ventura: Good question, Aguado. First, I'd establish a motive. In this case the killer saw the size of the bug's DICK and became insanely jealous. Then I'd lose 30 pounds... PORKIN' his wife. Woodstock: "What's the password?"
Ace: "New England clam chowder."
Woodstock: "Is that the red or the white?"
Ace: "I can never remember that. White?" Ace: "That's it. Einhorn is Finkle! Finkle is Einhorn! Einhorn is a man! Oh my God! Einhorn is a man!" Ace Ventura: (as Captain Kirk) "Captain's Log, stardate 23.9, rounded off to the nearest... decimal point. We've... traveled back in time to save an ancient species from total annihilation. So far... no signs of aquatic life, but.. I'm going to find it. If I have to tear this universe another black hole I'm going to find it. I've... got to, Mister!" Dan Marino: "Cry baby!"
Ace Ventura: "Jock!"
Dan Marino: "Wimp!"
Ace Ventura: "Muscle head!"
Lois Einhorn: "Shut up!"
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