|
Shannon: I use that to F*ck them in a very uncomfortable place.
Brody: what Like in the back of a volkswagon?
-Shannon and Brody Girl: Its a scooner!
Willam: you dumb brat its a sailboat
Boy: A scooner is a sailboat stupidhead
Willam: you know what? there is no easter bunny. That is just a guy in a suit.
-Willam and the kids - Brenda?
- [hitting him] DICK.
-William Black & Rene You know what. There is NO Easter Bunny. Over there, that's just a guy in a suit.
-William Black - Do you really wanna know?
- I asked, didn't I? I'm playing the role of concerned guy.
-Rene & Brodie - The proprietor of Fashionable Male beat a raincheck into my stomach.
- Shannon Hamilton?
-Brodie & Gwen - I went out with him once after we dated. He tried to screw me some place very uncomfortable.
- What? Like the back of a Volkswagen?
-Gwen & T.S. Why don't they ever bring back or remake good shows, like 'BJ and the Bear.' Now there's a concept I can't get enough of, a man and his monkey.
-Brodie You know, I think you ought to get him some help. He seems to be really hung up on super heroes' sex organs.
-Stan Lee - Haven't you ever heard the phrase "The customer is always right?"
- Let me tell you something. Let me give you a little secret, okay. THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS AN ASSHOLE!
-T.S. & Shannon - Free your minds.
- I'd like to free something...
-Ivannah & Brodie - The force is strong with this one.
- Dude, don't encourage him.
-Brodie to Silent Bob & Jay Most of the time I'm just talking out of my ass - or sticking my hand in it.
-Brodie Yeah, and she also said I had no dick. Which precedes the financial question, proving once more what women really look for.
-Brodie - What's he doing?
- Shithead here watched Empire and Jedi last week and ever since then, he's been trying to do the Jedi mind trick. The crazy fuck thinks he can levitate shit with his thoughts.
-T.S. & Jay - I heard that you were going to propose to Brandi Svenning at some theme park. When are men going to learn that women want ROMANCE, not Mr. Toad's Wild Ride...
- Hey, now, be fair. EVERYONE wants Mr. Toad's Wild Ride.
-Tricia Jones & Brodie Ah, 15. I thought she was 36!
-Shannon Hamilton - That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard.
- Too bad I'm not trying to marry you.
-Brodie & T.S. - Fucussa.
- That's what I was thinking.
- She said 'focus'.
-Ivannah, Brodie & T.S. Quint - You know about this game show they got goin' on here? We need you guys to somehow ensure that it doesn't happen.
- Is that it? We were gonna do that anyway.
-Brodie & Jay - They look happy, don't they?
- What, the bras?
-Stan Lee & Brodie - You two up for getting stoned?
- Look who you're asking!
-T.S. Quint to Jay and Silent Bob - Did you see that shit? You call that romance?
- I call that illegal.
-Brodie & Rene Can you two testosterone-seething, he-man, comic book fans finish up with this display of tough guy back-and-forth? I have some questions that need answering.
-T.S. Quint - I was warned about you. Take it easy before I have you removed from the mall.
- Warned? What the f#@k are you talking about?
-Steve-Dave & Brodie - Tell him, Steve-Dave.
- F#@k you, Fanboy.
-Walt & Brodie - There is something out there that can help us ease our simultanious double loss.
- What? Ritual suicide?
-Brodie & T.S. Brandi: suiter number three? Is your kiss soft or like a jackhammer?
Gil Hicks: I'd say like a jackhammer. I am in there with some pressure and when I am done, You're changed.
Brodie: Where do you come up with this Sh*T!
-Brandi and Gil hicks and Brodie Brandie: 2nd Suiter, if we were making whoopie...
Brodie: What like F@cking?
-Brandie and BRodie "Where do you get those wonderfull toys?"
(kisses silent bob on the cheek)
-Jay to Silent Bob Shannon:I'm A rebound guy. I pick up chicks that are coming off of a dissapointing relationship and f*** them in a very uncomfortable place.
Brodie:Where? Like the back of a Volkswagon?
-Shannon and Brodie Jay:Man, all you need to do is smoke a fattie, and you'll be seein a sailboat, an ocean and mabye two of those hot, big titted mermaids doin that lesbian s*it
-Jay to willam SNOOTCHIE NOOTCHIE BOOTCHIES!
-Jay That kid is back on the escalator again.
-Brodie I hope his pants get caught and a bloodbath insues.
-Brodie Jay: Fly Fatass Fly! Brody: You know the rule of my comics, touch not less yee be touched. Brody: Say Mr. Svenning, would you like a chocolate covered pretzel?
|
