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Alex: (To Dan) "You play fair with me, I'll play fair with you!"Fatal Attraction
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 Released: 1997
This is a Hoax
Note: Columbia Pictures Never Made a piece of crap like this but whoever created this put effort And What the Hell is Columbia Pictures:The Meltdown?
You Know its a Hoax
---You Have Been Warned---
Columbia Torch Lady's Travel Time Adventure is a computer animated short film starring Columbia Torch Lady of Columbia Pictures fame, premiering on the DVD release of Columbia Pictures: The Meltdown, much in the same vein as Gone Torchy on the previous movie's DVD release. This time, Columbia Torch Lady finds a buried time machine from a deceased time traveler, and chaos ensues to protect her beloved Torch from the threats of history.She is first sent off to the Middle Ages, where she retrieves Excaliber and is shot at with arrows by unseen soldiers. She seeks refuge in a cannon, which fires and sends her flying towards a storm of arrows. She activates the time machine, but it hits her Torch. Right before she flies into the storm, the machine activates, sending her off to ancient Rome. She arrives in the Colisseum, where her robe gets caught on a chariot. She is then growled at by a beast (presumably sent to fight with a gladiator), and she is sent off again, this time to 1912. She lands on an iceberg, and is later chased by the Titanic. She is then sent back in time to the setting of Columbia Pictures, where she fights another Miss Liberty (herself) for her Torch. The time machine fires, sending her to a fluury of diffenent locations and time periods: America launching the first moon mission (Columbia Torch Lady appears underneath the rocket), in a darkened jewelry store, in a locker room (female), in the French Revolution, where she appears under a guillotine, and Benjamin Franklin's famous expirement using a kite. She then appears in front of a wrecking ball, in front of the Fireworks Factory, on the tracks of a steam locomotive, and in front of Michelangelo's famous statue, David. She then punches the machine and is sent into a wormhole containing many time implements. She sees her Torch and attempts to reach it. She succeds, but is hit by a pocket watch and is sucked back into the wormhole, holding her Torch by one finger.In the end, In the end, Columbia Torch Lady lands in a field and finds a tree with a lot of Torchs. But when the time machine is about to work, Columbia Torch Lady breaks it. She tries to get her Torchs but she can't because the tree is made of bronze, and the worst part: it was man-made to let all know that there stood the last oak tree and the second worst part: Columbia Torch Lady is in the future. Columbia Torch Lady tries to go back in time to claim the first Torch that she had brought but the time machine breaks, leaving her stuck in the future, presumably forever until she dies. However, like Gone Torchy, this is not canon.
THIS LOOKS LIKE A LOAD OF BULL TO ME
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