Ed Kelvin:
"[Seeing Varney shoot the mayor] Varney... we said there would be no killing."
Boomer Hayes:
"These guys are cops?"
Ed Kelvin:
"Ex-cops... all ex-cops... this one was bumped off the force for corruption and the other one here I'm not sure."
Varney:
"Crime doesn't pay, boys! But it sure beats working."
Ed Kelvin:
"[Explaining what it's like being a cop in Beverly Hills] ... You start wondering... Hey what about me I put in the extra hours, I put my life on the line... what about having some the good stuff for me. And yet I keep being told that nowhere in the world cops are paid more than in Beverly Hills... well big fucking deal. This is nowhere else in the word this is Beverly Hills... a depository for the world's greed."
Benitez:
"You lame son-of-a-BITCH! SAY SOMETHING!"
Boomer Hayes:
"Did you see that throw I made today?"
Benitez:
"I hate football!"
Boomer Hayes:
"[Throws a rock at Beitez's head, killing him] Well, I really... hate guys... who don't like football."
Boomer Hayes:
"They're gonna need more then a battering-ram to get through this door."
Ed Kelvin:
"Uhh, I gotta tell you something."
Boomer Hayes:
"[Sees the SWAT tank heading straight for the door] OH, NO!"
Ed Kelvin:
"[Both start running] That's what I forgot to tell you!"
Boomer Hayes:
"Where did they get that from?"
Ed Kelvin:
"From the local SWAT armoury!"
Ed Kelvin:
"[as they steal a limo] Well at least we'll die in luxury."
Ed Kelvin:
"[Having just shot dead a fellow looter] There wasn't suppose to be any blood."
Boomer Hayes:
"[In disbelief] All these guys with guns and no-one suppose to get hurt?"
Boomer Hayes:
"You married?"
Ed Kelvin:
"Nah. My wife left me... for a dentist. Probably better oral sex or something. You know, we're both selfish men, except I'm goin' to jail for it."
Ed Kelvin:
"[On why he took part in the heist] Some of the greed rubbed off... what did you expect?"
Ed Kelvin:
"You're gonna love this, you know this car is worth 155,000 bucks?"
Boomer Hayes:
"So what?"
Ed Kelvin:
"Well, my house doesn't cost 155,000 bucks."
Boomer Hayes:
"Can't drive your house, can ya?"
Benitez:
"[Chasing Boomer in his Swat tank] Your ass is mine now quarterback!"
Varney:
"[Boomer throws Varney's bomb back at him] What? BOOMER!"
Varney:
"[Dropping a bomb at Boomer's feet] Looks like you're going to live up to your name after all... Boomer. [laughs]"
Benitez:
"Did you know that a human being's only natural defense is the use of his intelligence? But you wouldn't know a fucking thing about that, would you, Varney?"
Varney:
"Kinda leaves you unarmed doesn't it, Benitez?"
Ed Kelvin:
"[Conluding his opening monologue on Beverly Hills] ... Of course if you're a beverly hills cop like me you just can't afford to live here... makes you think doesn't it?"
Boomer Hayes:
"That's enough of this shit! I'm not playing defense anymore!"
Boomer Hayes:
"[Benitez has crashed his tank into a swimming pool] Touchdown, asshole!"
Benitez:
"It's only half-time, my friend. Half-time!"
Robert Masterson:
"[singing a song from the 'Christmas Carol' musical] Thank you very much! Thank you very much! It's the nicest thing anyone's ever done for me!"
Boomer Hayes:
"Good thing you're here, Bat. Been meaning to talk to you about my contract."
Robert Masterson:
"It's been canceled. [Fires cross-bow]"