SpongeBob SquarePants Quotes
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    34710
      SpongeBob:
      Patrick, you're a genius!
      Patrick:
      Yeah, I get called that a lot.
      SpongeBob:
      What? A genius?
      Patrick:
      No, "Patrick".
      34434
        Mom fish:
        What, what's with all the yelling? You just can't wait for me to die, won't you?
        Old lady:
        They're selling chocolate.
        Mom fish:
        WHAT? What are they selling?
        Old lady:
        Chocolate!
        Mom fish:
        Chocolate?
        Old lady:
        Yeah!
        Mom fish:
        ...what're they selling?
        Old lady:
        THEY'RE SELLING CHOCOLATE!
        Mom fish:
        Chocolate... I remember when they first made chocolate! Sweet, sweet chocolate... I ALWAYS HATED IT!
        SpongeBob:
        Well, this chocolate isn't for eating...
        Patrick:
        You rub it on your face and it makes you live forever!
        Mom fish:
        Live forever, you say? I'll take one! Come on, you lazy Mary! Start rubbing me with that chocolate!
        Old lady:
        I hate you.
        34433
          Hot sauce drop:
          Heheheheh! By the powers of naughtiness, I command this particular drop of hot sauce to be really, really hot!
          SpongeBob:
          Sandy! Wait! Victory is yours.
          Sandy:
          I knew you'd come to your senses, SpongeBob.
          34432
            Patrick:
            Nobody must know! Not even... Squidward's house!
            34431
              SpongeBob:
              I need... I need...
              Crowd:
              What do you need?
              SpongeBob:
              A tailor... because I ripped my pants!
              Crowd:
              Oh.
              34430
                Patrick:
                SPIDERS! SPIDERS! GET THEM OFF OF ME!
                33746
                  Spongebob:
                  Patrick, your genius is showing!
                  Patrick:
                  Where?!
                  32049
                    SpongeBob:
                    Attention customers, Today's special is a(dolphin noise)Krabby Patty served in a greasy(dolphin noise)sauce, and grilled to(dolphin noise)perfection! And don't forget to ask us to(dolphin noise)the(dolphin noise)fries! It'll be our(dolphin noise)pleasure!
                    31780
                      Squidward:
                      Patrick! I told you I'm claustrophobic!
                      Patrick:
                      Nice try Squidward but there's no Santa Claus here!
                      31779
                        Squidward:
                        Could you please not stand so close to me. You're making me claustrophobic.
                        Patrick:
                        What does Claustrophobic mean?
                        SpongeBob:
                        It means he's afraid of Santa Claus.
                        Patrick:
                        Ho ho ho!
                        SpongeBob:
                        Patrick stop! You're scaring him!
                        31777
                          Patrick:
                          Are you Squidward?
                          Fire Hydrant:
                          ...
                          Patrick:
                          That's OK. Take your time.
                          31603
                            Patrick:
                            If I ever find the guy who upset Clamu, I'll have a few choice words for him like "you", and "are", and "a jerk"!
                            31243
                              SpongeBob:
                              Hey Patrick, what does this word mean?
                              Patrick:
                              "Krabs." Isn't that the red, sweaty guy you work for?
                              31242
                                Squidward:
                                How about this? I call this one "Bold & Brash".
                                Art Collector:
                                More like "Belongs in the Trash"!
                                31241
                                  Squidward:
                                  Hey, give that back! I was just reaching my coda!
                                  Mr. Krabs:
                                  Well your coda is affecting my quota!
                                  31240
                                    SpongeBob:
                                    (imitating Squidward)Hey Sandy, who am I? Hello SpongeBob. Could you keep it down, I'm trying to be boring.
                                    31239
                                      SpongeBob:
                                      Hey Sandy. Watch me do the "Grouchy Squidward".
                                      Squidward:
                                      Stop naming moves after me!
                                      SpongeBob:
                                      (imitating Squidward)Everybody's an idiot except for me!
                                      Squidward:
                                      Well, it's true!
                                      31180
                                        Squidward:
                                        Look, SpongeBob. In case you forgot, here's how things work. I order the food, you cook the food, and the customer gets the food. We do that for 40 years, and then we die. That sounds like a good deal to me. What do you say?
                                        31179
                                          Mr. Krabs:
                                          You had to kill him. The boy cried you a sweater of tears, and you kill him!
                                          31178
                                            SpongeBob:
                                            Sunsets always remind me of bowls of fruit. What do they make you think of Suidward?
                                            Squidward:
                                            (imagines SpongeBob exploding) Explosions--I mean--erosion!