Freakazoid Quotes
      We interrupt this program to bring you an important announcement: I am actually a deep voiced woman. . . We now return you to you regularly scheduled program.
        Guitierrez and Freakazoid:
        [Guitierrez tries to find Freakazoid's weakness, he pulls a green rock out of his cloak] Behold, the purest Kryptonite. Are you feeling weak, my friend, oh so weak?
        Freakazoid: That's Superman's weakness, not mine!
        Guitierrez: Really?
        Freakazoid: Ye
        -Guitierrez and Freakazoid
          Lawn Gnomes:
          A Lawn Gnome: We are wise and cunning.
          Another Lawn Gnome: We stole man's fire and then tried to hide it in our pockets.
          A Lawn Gnome: That was painful and dumb. So we became even more cunning.
          -Lawn Gnomes
            Dexter Duncan and Debbie:
            Dexter Douglas: You know, Duncan, you're the only one who ever *sees* this blue guy.
            Duncan Douglas: He's *real*!
            Debbie Douglas: Well, of course he's real to *you* dear, but that's because you're probably insane.
            -Dexter Duncan and Debbie
              Guitierrez Psychologist and Chubbikins:
              Guitierrez: [cut to Mr. Chubbikins tied up with them] Bring in the animal psychologist!
              [he enters]
              Guitierrez: Ask him how he activated the flaw!
              Animal Psychologist: Meow, meow, meow?
              Mr. Chubbikins: Mrrow... mrrow...
              Animal Psychologist: Meow, meo
              -Guitierrez Psychologist and Chubbikins
                Debbie and Dexter:
                Debbie Douglas: You spend far too much time on that computer. It's not healthy.
                Dexter Douglas: It's my life.
                Debbie Douglas: That's so very, very sad.
                -Debbie and Dexter
                  Hans and Freakazoid:
                  Hans: Now, come. We mustn't linger. It is not safe here at night.
                  Freakazoid: It's day.
                  Hans: Well, then, I suppose we can linger for a moment.
                  -Hans and Freakazoid
                    Cosgrove and Jones:
                    Cosgrove: How come you don't say anything useful?
                    Professor Jones: How come you have the IQ of a biscuit?
                    Cosgrove: [raising his fist] How about I bend your body into funny balloon animal shapes?
                    Professor Jones: Perhaps I misspoke.
                    -Cosgrove and Jones
                      Cosgrove and Freakazoid:
                      Cosgrove how come you never got married?" "Because I like meat too much." "You can be married and still eat alot of meat." "..I didn't know that.
                      -Cosgrove and Freakazoid
                        Freakazoid and Stephanie:
                        S- When will I see you again? F- Well If I know my cartoons, and I do. I'll be back later on to rescue you from something Really Horrible! Bye bye! *tries to fly into the air* HUNF! HWAH! UP! UP! UUP! Up! GO UP! FLY! S- Freakazoid, you don't fly! F- Oh!
                        -Freakazoid and Stephanie
                          Freakazoid (singing):
                          Low Bridge! Everybody down! Low Bridge, Cave Guy's underwear is brown! Brown brown! He's got the cooties, oo-ooties!
                          -Freakazoid (singing)
                            Freakazoid and the:
                            I want someone to call me a lawyer! Ok, you're a lawyer. Thank you!
                            -Freakazoid and the
                              Freakazoid to Freakadog:
                              Look at you squeezy face! You have sweet meats inside you don't you? I'm gonna squeeze you and they're gonna come out!
                              -Freakazoid to Freakadog
                                Jack Valenti:
                                We've put together a little motion picture about Freakazoid's origin. It's filled with action and adventure and even features a scene with a man wrestling a bear for no reason.
                                -Jack Valenti
                                  Lord Bravery and Mr Snarzetti:
                                  Lord Bravery: What kind of superhero would call himself Lord Smoked Meats and Fishes?
                                  Mr. Snarzetti: Ah. One who wants to use the element of surprise.
                                  -Lord Bravery and Mr Snarzetti
                                    Now, now, ladies, there's plenty of me for everybody - if not, I'll just have 'em draw me bigger.
                                      We interrupt this program to increase dramatic tension.
                                        I wish I were home reading funny stories in binary.
                                          [after a long, passionate kiss] That was shallow, cheap, and based solely on hormones. Works for me!
                                            I don't want to go down into the sewer. It smells like poo gas.