Pee-Wee's Playhouse Quotes
    Close
    32115
      Gerald:
      What's your name, Kid?
      Pee-Wee Herman:
      Uh, Pee-Wee Herman!
      Gerald:
      Well, You listen to me, Pee-Wee Herman. Making prank phone calls is against the law! If I was such a nice guy, I would have take you downtown and throw you into jail! How would you like that?
      Pee-Wee Herman:
      No, Officer. I wouldn't want that. I have just learn my lesson.
      31677
        Johnny Wilson (The Conky Repairman):
        I only a few more switches and we are all set. (After he fixes Conky he yells for Pee-Wee) PEE-WEE, We are ready.
        Pee-Wee Herman:
        (Turns Conky on and Conky Starts up and everybody cheered as the happy fanfare played)How do you feel, Conky?
        Conky 2000:
        I feel Great!
        Everybody:
        (Screaming as the word "GREAT" flashes on the bottom of the screen).
        Pee-Wee Herman:
        So, What was the wrong with Conky?
        Johnny Wilson (The Conky Repairman):
        Well, It was nothing serious. He just needed a little tune up.
        31140
          Pee-Wee Herman:
          JAMBI! HELP!!! (Knocks on Jambi's Box Several times, As Pee-Wee tries to grant a wish on his toothache not to be so painful)
          Jambi's answering machine:
          Hello, I am not here to grant your wish right now. So please write your name, and wish after the beep. And I'll be back to grant them just as soon as I can. (BEEP!)
          31139
            Ricardo:
            Look what I got for you, Nice piece of foil for your foil ball.
            Pee-Wee Herman:
            Oh, I forgot to tell you, Ricardo. My foil ball got so big, I could not keep it in the house (Everybody screams as the secret word: "HOUSE" flashes)
            Ricardo:
            So, What did you do with it?
            Pee-Wee Herman:
            I donated it to the Foil Museum. But now I have rubber band ball.
            Ricardo:
            Well, That's good news. I have a rubber band for your rubber band ball.
            31138
              Pee-Wee Herman:
              (Uses the portable can air horn to stop the kids from playing too rough and being out of control) Alright kids, I want to have a chat with you. Okay? (Everyone screams as the secret word: "OKAY" flashes) Now, A playhouse is a place where anybody can play. But you kids we're playing too loud, too noisy, and too rough. You cannot run around the playhouse, Screaming, and jumping on the furniture. You welcome to play anytime that you want. But for now, I want you to go home. And remember what said, I would not have tell you. (The kids left with disappointment)
              Mister Window:
              (After the kids left) They're all gone.
              31109
                Pee-Wee Herman:
                Is there anything else that we can help, Firefighter Derrick?
                Derrick:
                Yes, A lot of these tips are available at your local fire department (gave Pee-Wee Herman a sticker that has his phone number) Here is my phone number. Make sure to put this near your telephone.
                31108
                  Randy:
                  So is that bread ready, yet?
                  Pee-Wee Herman:
                  No, Randy. The bread have burned because someone turned the temperature way up on the oven. Do you who could have done something stupid like that?
                  Randy:
                  I did it! Heh-Heh-Heh
                  Clocky:
                  Randy, How could you?
                  Mr. Window:
                  Why did you do that for?
                  Whole Characters:
                  (All argues at once)
                  Miss Yvonne:
                  Why, Randy, Why?!?
                  Randy:
                  I thought it would quicker if it's hotter.
                  Pee-Wee Herman:
                  Randy, You know you were not suppose to touch the oven.
                  Randy:
                  Well, I am very sorry about the bread. I'll go down the bakery and get you another one.
                  Everybody:
                  (Screaming as we see the secret word: "ONE" flashing)
                  Pee-Wee Herman:
                  Randy, I don't care about the bread, I care about the fire safety in the playhouse.
                  31107
                    Derrick:
                    Is everything okay?
                    Pee-Wee Herman and Miss Yvonne:
                    Mm-Hmmm.
                    Derrick:
                    Well, Fortunately. There was not a fire, Just a bunch of smoke. Here is how it started (Shows Pee-Wee Herman and Miss Yvonne the burned bread)
                    Miss Yvonne:
                    Oh no, My bread.
                    Derrick:
                    Sorry, I do love homemade bread.
                    Pee-Wee Herman:
                    Gee, Firefighter Derrick. How could this have happen?
                    Derrick:
                    Well, Anything will burn like that at 700 degrees.
                    Miss Yvonne:
                    700 degrees?!? But I set up the oven in 350 degrees. Didn't I, Pee-Wee.
                    Pee-Wee Herman:
                    Yeah, Who could have done it?
                    Derrick:
                    Well, somebody must had turned it way up to 700 degrees.
                    15318
                      Pee-wee (putting pajamas on his ventriloquist dummy, Billy Baloney): Mm-mm-la-la... there we go. Now one leg... the other leg. There now, Billy. Aren't those nice pajamas?
                      Billy Baloney: YES, THANK YOU!
                      (Pee-wee laugh)
                      (Picture-Phone starts ringing)
                      Pee-wee and Billy: I'LL GET IT!
                      Pee-wee: Oh, sorry, Billy. I'll get it...
                      (Pee-wee runs to Picture-Phone, pulls down a desert-themed shade, pulls the lever, dons a fez, and picks up can-receiver)
                      Pee-wee: Pee-wee's Playhouse; Pee-wee speaking...
                      (a hungry person on a couch comes on the screen)
                      Hungry person: Hey. I'd like to order a large pepperoni pizza, (cut back to Pee-wee, surprised) uh, two root beers, (cut back to hungry person) and a triple-scoop chocolate sundae with everything on it.
                      Pee-wee (holding his nose, as if to imitate a telephone operator): I'm sorry, please check the number again and be sure that you are dialing correctly.
                      (Hungry person stares blankly for a moment, hangs up)
                      Pee-wee (takes off fez, pulls lever back): I love wrong numbers! (laughs)
                      15317
                        Pee-wee: As I sing a song, won't you sing along? 'Cause I know your name is...
                        You are my friend, and I can depend, 'cause I know your name is...
                        My name is Pee-wee, and you are... and I would never lie.
                        You can call me Pee-wee, I'll call you... I know you are, but what am I?
                        Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! TAKE IT!
                        Chairry: My name is Chairry, and you are...
                        Globey: My name is Globey, and you are...
                        Billy: My name is Billy, and you are...
                        Pee-wee: My name is Pee-wee, and you are...!
                        (cheers and applause)
                        Pterri: (continues singing) My name is Pterri. My name is Pterri. My name is Pterri. My name is Pterri. My name is Pterri...
                        Pee-wee: Pterri? Pterri! Pterri, the song is over!
                        Pterri: (stops) Oh. Well, how was I supposed to know about it?
                        (Pee-wee laughs)
                        15316
                          Reba: "Hello!"
                          Pee-Wee: "AHHHHH! Breaks! Breaks!"
                          Reba: "Sorry, I did not mean to make the airplane stop!"
                          (The Characters scream at the secret word, Stop)
                          15315
                            Pee-wee: (picture phone rings) "I'll get it! I'll get it!" (answers) "Pee-wee's Playhouse, Pee-wee speaking."
                            15314
                              Cowboy Curtis: "Woo Wee!"
                              15313
                                Pee-wee: (singing) "Connect the dots, la la la la. Connect the dots, la la la la."
                                15312
                                  Magic Screen: "Hey, Pee-wee, it's time to play with me."
                                  Pee-wee: "OK, Magic Screen. Here I come."
                                  15311
                                    Conky: "Conky 2000. Ready to assist you, Pee-wee."
                                    15310
                                      Cowntess: "Moo hoo! Pee-wee!"
                                      15309
                                        Dixie: "Presenting his majesty... The King of Cartoons!"
                                        15308
                                          Jambi: "Wish? Did somebody say wish?"
                                          15307
                                            King of Cartoons: "Let the cartoon... begin."