Clerks Quotes
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    10414
      Jay: Olaf, what part of Russia you from?
      Olaf Oleeson: Moscow.
      10413
        Wynarski: A wise ass too huh? Yeah, keep crackin' wise. That's why you're jockeying some f*ckin' cash register in a local convenience store instead of out there workin' a real job.
        10412
          Jay: Pack o' wraps, my brotherman, time to kick back, drink some beers and smoke some weed!
          10411
            Dante Hicks: A little word of advice, my friend. Sometimes you gotta let those hard-to-reach chips go.
            10410
              Randal Graves: I'll bet you 20 bucks you don't get to rent that tape.
              10409
                Wynarski: Hey, you see a set keys around here?
                Randal Graves: No time for love, Doctor Jones!
                10408
                  Veronica Loughran: Freeze! Let's see some credentials. *Slowly*. You're a Chewley's Gum Representative? And you're stirring up all this anti-smoking sentiment to, what, sell more gum? GET OUT OF HERE! And you people, don't you have jobs to go to? Get out of here, go commute! You oughta be ashamed of yourselves. Bunch of easily-led automatons. Try thinking for yourselves before you pelt an innocent man with cigarettes!
                  10407
                    Randal Graves: Some guy just came in refusing to pay late fees. Said the video store was closed for two hours yesterday. So, I tore up his membership.
                    Dante Hicks: Shocking abuse of authority.
                    Randal Graves: Hey, I'm a firm believer in the philosophy of a ruling class. Especially since I rule.
                    10406
                      Randal Graves: Duh duh... duh duh... duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh... Salsa shark! We're gonna need a bigger boat! Man goes into cage, cage goes into salsa. Shark's in the salsa. Our shark.
                      10405
                        Jay: I don't care if she's my cousin or not, I'm gonna knock those boots again tonight.
                        10404
                          Dante Hicks: You get me slapped with a fine. You pick fights with the customers and I have to patch everything up. You get us chased out of a funeral home by violating a corpse. To top it all off, you ruined my relationship with Veronica! What's your encore? Do you, like, anally rape my mother while pouring sugar in my gas tank?
                          10403
                            Dante Hicks: You hate people!
                            Randal Graves: But I love gatherings. Isn't it ironic?
                            10402
                              Dante Hicks: Hey, try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!
                              10401
                                Dante Hicks: 37! My girlfriend sucked 37 dicks!
                                Customer: In a row?
                                10400
                                  Dante Hicks: I'm 37?
                                  10399
                                    Dante Hicks: Yeah, I mean aside from the cheating, we were a great couple. I mean that's what high school was about, algebra, bad lunch, and infidelity.
                                    10398
                                      Randal Graves: People say crazy shit during sex. One time I called this girl "Mom."
                                      10397
                                        Silent Bob: You know, there's a million fine looking women in the world, dude. But they don't all bring you lasagna at work. Most of 'em just cheat on you.
                                        10396
                                          Dante Hicks: Someone jammed gum in the locks.
                                          Veronica Loughran: You're kidding.
                                          Dante Hicks: Bunch of savages in this town.
                                          10395
                                            Hubcap Customer: Do you sell hubcaps for a '72 Pinto hatchback? Ooh, Mini-Trucker Magazine!