Dirty Work Quotes
    Close
    9901
      Mitch: Note to self: Making love to blow-up doll is not as good as advertised.
      9900
        Mitch: Okay, Cole. Well, it's been nice doing business with you. Now you probably want to go home and kick back and enjoy a nice, tall, cold glass of chihuahua piss or something.
        9899
          Kathy: So... Would you like to come in for some coffee?
          Mitch: No no. Uh, I can't. I have to lift weights? What?
          9898
            Mitch: There's two kinds of people in this world - Those who get stomped on and those who do the stomping.
            Kathy: Where'd you come up with that theory?
            Mitch: That famous guy said it. What's his name? Uh... Oh, yeah. Jesus!
            9897
              Mitch: Note to self: Remember no matter how bad life gets, there is always beer!
              9896
                Mitch: Sam, are you pissing off the side of the building?
                Sam: Sorta.
                9895
                  Mitch: Oh, my God! It's a picture of you and my mom! And you're having sex!
                  9894
                    Mitch: Okay, settle down, prostitutes. Now, understand that you each get twenty dollars, and this requires no sex, no sex at all, regardless of what this character tells you.
                    9893
                      Mr. Hamilton: So there you are, tubby. Look like a bucket of lard on a bad day. You baby gorilla. Why don't you work in a zoo, and stop bothering people? Got a call yesterday from Baskin Robbins. They said that they're down to only five flavors. You're swelling up as I talk to you.
                      9892
                        Jimmy: And there's the Saigon whore that bit my nose off!
                        9891
                          Mitch: I've never seen so many dead hookers in all my life!
                          Bystander: Lord knows I have.
                          9890
                            Mitch: Good news, Mr. McKenna!
                            Pops: All right, boys! Bring on the whore!
                            Mitch: No, it's not a whore - we're gonna get you the fifty thousand dollars for your heart transplant!
                            Pops: Well, that's good too.
                            9889
                              Dr. Farthing: I know there's really nobody to blame for this but myself, well, I don't know, maybe the Buffalo Bills, the Boston Red Sox, or Mr. T or, or the Jets...
                              Mitch: Wait a minute, Mr T.? Are you telling me that you bet on the fight in Rocky III, and that you bet against Rocky?
                              Dr. Farthing: Hindsight is twenty-twenty, my friend.
                              9888
                                Pops: I'm in whore heaven!
                                9887
                                  Mitch: You fellas have a lot of growing up to do, I'll tell you that. Ridiculous. Completely ridiculous. Can you believe these characters? Way out of line. Way out of line. Have a good mind to go to the warden about this. You know what hurts the most is the... the lack of respect. You know? That's what hurts the most. Except for the... Except for the other thing. That hurts the most. But the lack of respect hurts the second most.
                                  9886
                                    Mitch: Are those prostitutes? I mean, who are those girls?
                                    9885
                                      Mitch: Note to self: remember to get ass wart cream for giant wart on my ass.
                                      9884
                                        Kathy: You guys are brothers?
                                        Mitch: Well, it's a long story...
                                        Sam: My dad boned his mom.
                                        Mitch: Okay, it's a short story.
                                        9883
                                          Mitch: Hey, hey! Hey, you remember in 5th grade when I was under the monkey bars and I sneaked a peek at your sister's underwear? Remember that? Hey, no no! I was sneaking a peek at my *own* sister's underwear!
                                          Sam: That's right! Yeah, and then remember in the 12th grade, you had sex with her?
                                          9882
                                            Mitch: Dr. Farthing, what happened to your arm?
                                            Dr. Farthing: Well, it was either from sleeping on it the wrong way or bookmakers throwing me out of a speeding car.