Home Alone Quotes
      I made my family disappear!
        You're not at all worried that something might happen to Kevin?
        No, for three reasons: A) I'm not that lucky. 2) We have smoke detectors. And D) We live on the most boring street in the United States of America, where nothing remotely dangerous will ever happen, period.
          Kate and Peter:
          WE SLEPT IN!
            Kevin McAllister: "A lovely cheese pizza... just for me!"
              I took a shower washing every body part with actual soap; including all my major crevices; including in between my toes and in my belly button which I never did before but sort of enjoyed. I washed my hair with adult formula shampoo and used cream rinse for that just-washed shine. I can't seem to find my toothbrush, so I'll pick one up when I go out today. Other than that, I'm in good shape

              - Kevin McCallister
                Johnny: "Who is it?"
                Snakes: "It's me, Snakes. I got the stuff."
                Johnny: "Leave it on that doorstep and get the hell outta here."
                  Harry: "I don't get it. Right now it looks like there's nobody home. Last night the place was jumpin'. Something ain't right. Go check it out."
                  Marv: "Now?"
                  Harry: "No. Tomorrow, egg head. Now! Get in!"
                    Hey, I'm not afraid anymore! I said, I'm not afraid anymore! Did you here me? I said I'm not afraid any- *sees Old Man Marley* AAAGGGHHHH!!!!!!!! -Kevin
                      This house is so full of people it makes me sick! When I grow up and get married, I'm living alone! Did they here me? *jumps up and down* I'M LIVING ALONE! I'M LIVING ALONE!
                        Kevin: "This is ridiculous. Only a whimp would be hiding under the bed.. but I can't be a whimp. I'm the man of the house."
                          Kevin: "Mom, Uncle Frank won't let me watch the movie, but the big kids can. Why can't I?"
                          Kate: "Kevin, i'm on the phone."
                          Kevin: "It's not even rated R. He's just being a jerk."
                          Kate: *sigh*, "Kevin if Uncle Frank says no... then it must be really bad."
                          Kate: (on the phone) "No, i'm not bringing the dogs I put them in the kennel.. HEY, HEY GET OFF! Kevin, out of the room."
                          Kevin: "Hang up the phone and make me why don'tcha?"
                          Kate: "Ugh, this kid."
                            Kevin: "Dad, nobody'll let me do anything."
                            Peter: "You don't have anything to do? I'll tell you what you can do, you can pick up those Micro Machines that are all over in there. Aunt Leslie stepped on one and almost broke her neck."
                            Kate: "He was in the garage again playing with the glue gun."
                            Peter: "Didn't we talk about that?"
                            Kevin: "Did I burn down the joint? I don't think so. I was making ornaments out of fish hooks."
                            Peter: "My new fish hooks?"
                            Kevin: "I can't make ornaments out of the old ones, where dried worm got stuck on 'em."
                              (after looking at a Play Boy magazine)" No clothes on anyone- sickening!"
                                Megan McCallister: The dope was whining about a suit case. What was I supposed to do? Shake his hand and say, "Congratulations, you're an idiot"?
                                  Frank McCallister: [talking to Leslie] Wow, that's real crystal. Put it in your purse.
                                    Kevin McCallister: "Is this toothbrush approved by the American Dental Association"?
                                      Santa Claus: Damn. How can you give Kris Kringle a parking ticket on Christmas Eve? What's next, rabies shots for the Easter Bunny?
                                        Harry and Marv:
                                        Harry: Marv! Why'd you take your shoes off?!
                                        Marv: Why the hell are you dressed like a chicken?
                                        -Harry and Marv
                                          Harry and Marv:
                                          "Harry: We're not gonna hurt you. Marv: No, No. Got some nice presents for you. Harry: Be a good little fella now and open the door."
                                          -Harry and Marv
                                            Kevin and Harry:
                                            Kevin: (on the other side of the door) "Oh, no, I'm really scared!"
                                            Harry: "It's too late for you kid. We're already in the house. We're gonna get you!"
                                            -Kevin and Harry