• siftersifting
    • 5 years 9 months ago
    • Posts: 154
    		 "why?" shawn asked as he sweat threw this next snowstorm , sitting comfortably,in the old carseat. "This is home" he thought to himself, preteniously and quite sarcastilcally , sarcastic enough. As the snow caked on the glass in front of him, he took out the old receipt and broken pencil , added the 233 tally mark. 233 days, Two Hundred Thirty Three days in the car. he remembered before he was there.before when it was all an inimaginable hell."Pue" Shawn Sighed, closed his eyes and opened then not half a second later."bitch" he again thought to himself "that fucking bich, that Mrs Westlin" Mrs Westlin was in the car ajacent to his, only she had stopped moving a few months ago. The cars are roughly 60 feet apart and you can just barley see the shadows of people around you,in their cars. It really was comforting to Shawn, Watching another women. He missed women, the one thing he missed from that cruel place. He remembered from november , october , right around when she, Mrs Westlin was as sexually distrested as he.Something had caused her to stop moving in december, wheather it was suicide or sudden death, the thought was discomforting to Shawn as it constanly buzzed in his brain.but he still masturbates to her.quite often though he's not proud, he'll do it on occasion still.it didnt matter. there was no morality anymore.Her name wasent Westlin but a small indentation in her car said differenty.he sat up sharp , exhailed and than inhailed and exhailed and inhailded and exhailed and inhailed and so on. it made him laugh, and that was very important. "my hands - are very cold" he said aloud, also a way twards a quick entertainment for himself.He assumded that he would be there for the rest of his life, but as he once again established , it was a better life than outside.a cold depressing place.Shawn flipped on his radio, and they were talking about George W Bush, and how John Kerry has more expirence. some nut opinion."someone is fucking around here" he said to himself, and there was, a man about 5' 6'' 175 pounds walked right past shawn's car.Other men especially scared the hell out of him. he was parked out 5 miles down a jogging trail.off-trail , other men intimiated Shawn and caused him to feel depressed and angry, full of hate and anxiety,if it was a women he would just stare at their figues. and wish'd as he wrap his alienated mind around their supple womenlike frames. and mentally rape them as well as he could do to his advantage. Shawn did what he had done everytime, as he got out of the car and came up quietly behind the man (in this time assuming his weight,height and reason) and without letting the smalled sound sneak through his cracked,dry lip's he tackled the man, thrust his face into the ground of hard mountinous lava rock-like soil, and lastly, after about 3 and a half minutes, checked the mans pulse. it had been still going.Shawn , today, was going to break into the Maintence shed of the Switzer Canyon Apartments parking lot inwhich he had been seeing the entrance to , about 200 feet away from the trail.People Had been staring to much.Their eyes glaring."fuck that" ,Shawn said to himself,13 minutes later as he threw a rock into the heavy steel masterlock on the shed's wooden old, creeking, doors. with puke light green colored paint chips,chipping away from the wood threw time.He had spent at least 5 heavy blows away at the masterlock. He was tired,So tired.Then the doors opened,he did not realize, for the fact he was disoriented.Extremly disoriented.Inside,was a couch and a static-filled radio version of Janet Jackson's "thrust" blaring from a grubby Samsung boombox,In the Maintence Shed, there was a plastic shelf,several tools,clothing, all scattered around on the floor.There was a couch older than dust.Shawn had lied on the couch and while sweating reached down to feel under the couch and pulled out a Snickers Wrapper.as he stared at its irredescent packaging,he thought of the Car,and remembered the musty smell that had absorbed into the walls of the car.the smell was putrid from urine,Feces,and semen.all he could eat to survive was he own body's wastes.he was uncomfortable and sad.the door was open and he could still smell it.It had been permanently cemeneted into his brain.he was chipper, mostly because the blank stares kept him alive. but that was only temperary. Shawn, himself, couldnt help but be in an aware state of being.he got up from sitting in the warn couch, and than the light from the sun immidiatly glared in his eyes (something that he hasent minded for a few months) ,things hadent changed much in the 6 1/2 minutes spent outside of the car.he was still burdened by an unwelcome guest, his solitude was exactly that.
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