16 Characters who get Shafted

Many Cartoons get short-ended, but most get 'em more


WARNING: YOU MAY DISAGREE!!!

We see many cartoon characters who try their best to NOT be the 2nd Banana or is always the underdog, but there are some cartoon characters who CAN'T get to the top no matter how hard they try.

And this is my first Top-16 List. (I just liked the number 16 when I was a child so...)

#16...Bullwinkle J. Moose




Bullwinkle seems to get himself in trouble every time something happens, especially from the Russian Spies Boris and Natasha. If it wasn't for Rocky saving him every time, Bullwinkle would be higher on this list. And Bullwinkle NEVER got that rabbit out of the hat no matter how hard he tried. So stay tuned for...the Black-Balled Cat...or The Super-Sized Mouse!

#15...Sylvester Cat




For a cat that gets Black-Balled (this is a quote from "Bell Hoppy") every time he tries to chase Tweety, even when he tries to help Sylvester...yes, Tweety's a boy hence the Little Blue Hat! But what puts Sylvester on this list is that he tries to make his son proud by chasing mice, but gets knocked-out by a Giant Mouse (Kangaroo) named Hippety Hopper.

#14...Brian Griffin




Oh, I can hear all the fan people say "Brian doesn't get shafted"! But you're wrong! Brian Griffin can't seem to get Ms. Right, has 2 failed Books, can't finish college, and has to take a lot of crap from people...especially Glen Quagmire. So if I was Brian Griffin, I too would have an excuse to drink!

#13...Gil Gunderson




Of all The Simpsons Characters that seem to have nothing but Bad Luck...it has to be a minor character named Gil. Inspired by Jack Lemmon's character Shelley Levene of "Glengarry Glen Ross", Gil NEVER seems to get a Lucky Break from anything!

#12...Klaus Heissler




Picture this...you're a German Ski Jumper for the '86 Olympics, but you get your brain transferred to a Goldfish before ANY of that can happen! Well, that's what happened to Klaus. And of everyone in The Smith Family of "American Dad"...he gets NO respect!

#11...Squit




And that's how I became a Goodfeather....

Based on the movie "The Goodfellas", The Goodfeathers would get themselves in a heap of trouble, but it's usually Squit who get the crap beaten-out of him every episode by Pesto. (Even Joe Peschi's character that was based upon Pesto NEVER beat the crap out of Ray Liotta's character)! And Bobby just laughs throughout. Squit sure has the short-end, even with his girlfriend Shasha.

#10...Carl Brutananadilewski




You live in New Jersey, have odd friends who look like Fast Food, but every day you deal with Prostitutes who take your money and run, get tortured by Aliens, and wind-up getting the Lorena Bobbit Special at Wong Burger! Carl seems to get it all and more so, heck...his dad even made him work on Christmas! How low can you get?

#9...Johnny Bravo




You look like James Dean and you sound like Elvis Presley, that'll get all the girls to come to you, right?...

WRONG!

When you're Johnny Bravo, you tend to screw-up every time a lady walks by. No matter how hard Johnny tries, even getting advice from his mom he can't seem to win the lady of his dream.

#8...Odie




I could have Jon Arbuckle on here because he can't seem to get the girl, I could put Nermal on here because he's getting sent to Abu Dhabi which is a province in United Arab Emerates, but Odie deserves the spot because every day this simple-minded dog gets the worst out of Garfield since he gets kicked-off the table numerous times and takes a lot from Garfield!

#7...Wile E. Coyote




Right now I'd like to show you one of my favorite cartoons. It's a sad, depressing story about a pathetic coyote who spends every waking moment of his life in the futile pursuit of a sadistic roadrunner who MOCKS him and LAUGHS at him as he's repeatedly CRUSHED and MAIMED! Hope you ENJOY IT!!!

From the words of Gerorge Newman ("Weird Al" Yankovic) in the film "UHF", this seems to be true for a hungry coyote named Wile E. Coyote. Sure, he may be after the Roadrunner, but when you live in the Grand Canyon region in Arizona and there's no restaurant around...you have to eat something! And though Wile rarely talks, he tries to outsmart Bugs with all his ACME Products that he used with the Roadrunner, but returns by calling himself "MUD".

And MUD spelled backwards is DUM!

#6...Loopy de Loop




It's the early 60's, Segregation Strife in the South is at its Height and what character seems to feel that same strife?...

Loopy De Loop!


It seems that he gets maimed and knocked-down for his beliefs that not all wolves are going to eat you or leave you for dead. But at a time like the 60's, Loopy seemed loopy for many. And not only Loopy gets the shaft in almost all the cartoons he was in...but he got shafted by The Hanna-Barbera Library as well, even Yippie, Yappe, and Yahooey got recognition before Loopy would! Have you ever seen Loopy de Loop in ANY cartoon after his run between 1959 and 1965? I haven't, except for "Yo Yogi" where he plays a chef! Talk about a Losing Streak that wasn't made from The Quebec Nordiques!

#5...Donald Duck




You may know Donald's Theme!...

Who's got the sweetest disposition?
One guess, that's who?
Who'd never, ever start an argument?
Who never shows a bit of temperament?
Who's never wrong but always right?
Who'd never dream of starting a fight?
Who get stuck with all the bad luck?
No one but Donald Duck!


That's Donald Duck in a nutshell...he never gets a lucky break! Though half of the stuff he does is his own doing, but when you're a duck who can't put a word in edgewise because people can't understand you and get frustrated with almost anything you do...it seems every day you wake-up on the wrong side of the bed! Having to face a neighbor called Pete, nephews, Buzz the bee, Chip and Dale, and 200 ants...it seems that Donald Duck has a lot on his plate and too much frustrations with many! It's like he's Tom and has a Million Jerries...speaking of which...

#4...Thomas "Jasper" Cat




Thomas has one purpose in life...to catch a disease-ridden mouse called Jerry! But it seems that every time Tom chases Jerry he gets outsmarted! Whether it's from Jerry's cousin, Spike, Butch the Cat, or even Mammy Two-Shoes, Tom CAN'T chase Jerry who ruins everything he touches.

Now I feel sorry for Tom, because Jerry's attitude with Tom is "That's what Cats get for eating Mice"! And now Jerry is ruining everything with his diseased-infested feet! (And this was prior to when Tom and Jerry were friends)!

#3...Meg Griffin




It seemed that once the 2002 "Family Guy" got cancelled, Meg Griffin was respected by her family...but once it returned in 2005, she got crapped-on!

Meg is mocked every day now and she even said she was through being their punching-bag throughout the years, but then she took it all back! The only one who understands her is Brian...the Family Dog! But it seems that Meg has to be the butt of the show!

#2...Kenny McCormick




OH MY GOD...THEY KILLED KENNY!!!


This was said every time Kenny got destroyed, not only Kenny lives in poverty and we can't understand a word from his parka, but it seems that Kenny dies every episode prior to his REAL death in "Kenny Dies". But Kenny then reveals that he CAN'T die no matter how many times he's killed. It seems that he lives like Phil Connors (Played by Bill Murray) in "Groundhogs Day", all we need is this played on Kenny's radio...



AND NOW...


#1...Charlie Brown!




You probably saw this coming, but for someone who's bald before adulthood, can't kick a football because of some wicked girl named Lucy, having a Baseball Losing Streak that would make The Cleveland Indians look like The Darn New York Yankees, getting a kite eaten by a tree, losing a Spelling Bee under pressure, and never seeing that Red-Haired Girl...I can go on forever with Charlie Brown, but based upon Charles Monroe "Sparky" Schulz...he proved that ANYONE can have a Charlie Brown moment in life, like in the last song in "A Boy Named Charlie Brown"....



Now I know I may have forgotten some characters like Daffy Duck, Elmer Fudd, Stimpson Cat and Milhouse van Houten to name a few...but these characters have either accomplished in a few cartoons...or were just too darn greedy and selfish to make this list!














Log in to comment on or rate this article. You can even write your own!
Comments
    pikachulover Posted 1 year 4 months ago
    I agree about Tom and Sylvester. That's why I love them so much! I agree about Meg too. I think Katnip is another cat character who gets shafted too.
    Benjanime Posted 1 year 6 months ago
    i would've chosen disco stu over gil gunderson
    MrCleveland Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    @Knites...I just saw something from "Family Guy" where Peter beats the crap out of Lucy because of the whole football thing!
    Knites Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    Charlie Brown. There were times I wished he would run up and kick Lucy through the goalposts. Who's AUUGH!in' now, b**tch! And, something you might find interesting: http://onceuponageek.com/2008/12/10/charlie-brown-manga-style/
    MrCleveland Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    @bluquail...I tried to find the best vid for "A Boy Named Charlie Brown"...but this is all that I could find. And no...I didn't film it!
    bluquail Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    It's funny how you're reflected in the TV screen during the closing credits of A Boy Named Charlie Brown. Therefore we can see you filming it.
    MrCleveland Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    Like I said...Daffy ISN'T on the list because 1/2 the time he wants Bugs Bunny dead or dumbed-down. Wile E. Coyote has an excuse since he's miles away from a McDonald's.

    @lody666...I see Inspector Gadget as a Hero who makes it, now his boss...or whatever he is...Gets The Shaft everytime since the letters explode on him.

    @princess of power...I never saw Doug as a shafted character...I see Skeeter more like that. Meowth...I see as a Bastard. Chuckie...yeah, he DOES get shafted a little.

    But as I said...NOT everyone can agree.
    princess of power Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    This is a great list and your commentaries made me laugh, even if I do humbly disagree with a few of your choices. Brian Griffin, or as my friends and I all call him "Racist Fido", I don't believe to be too shafted. His love/hate relationship with Stewie has given him too much power, if you ask me, and whatever crap he gets, he deserves. I felt bad for Gil for the longest, while still being able to laugh at his miseries...at least until the Kill Gil episode made him unsympathetic and annoying, but I mainly blame Marge for that.

    Good ol' Chuck deserves the number one spot on the list; what other character has gotten so much undeserving hate in the history of cartoons? Donald Duck is another great choice (and thanks for adding the lyrics!) Other people I believe get the perpetual shaft include Doug Funnie (particularly in the Disney version), Tracey Sketchit, Meowth, Chuckie Finster, Rita from Animaniacs, Beastly and Odie's long-suffering master Jon Arbuckle.

    Very clever article, nonetheless; it really makes you think. Thumbs up!
    jpdraven Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    Im surprised Daffy Duck didnt make the list.
    memboy12 Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    hey i think charlie brown be getting shafted out of all em'
    because the way that Lucy be treating him like always taking the football away
    from charlie brown
    chokeslam Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    Hey, there's nothing wrong with Seth Mcfalane nod, 15 YEARS FROM NOW!!!! LOL
    lody666 Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    So not only did we get three Seth Mcfarlane nods in here but you completely left out Inspector gadget

    Go Go Gadget BS sniffer
    retrodave Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    Nice liss great character even though they always fail.
    shemps1 Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    Lovers of the classic cartoons are getting shafted when the Looney Tunes can't get a proper chronological and uncut release like the great Tom and Jerry recent release. Sigh.
    Guild_Navigator Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    Great list,dude,BUT...where is Daffy Duck? There's a character who's always trying to take away the spotlight from Bugs and always fails...miserably. Not to mention always getting OWNED by Bugs in any argument and thus becoming the receiving end of Elmer's pellets.

    That is the reason I've always loved more the original whacky Daffy from the 1930s than its overtly-jealous,high blood pressure-suffering moder incarnation. Wo-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho!
    jnewtx Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    They get shafted for our enjoyment!
    MrCleveland Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    ^Okay, I HAVE some modern characters. But every time I see these cartoons, they're NEVER lucky! I just saw one list that didn't seem right, but like I said...I put a Warning up there.

    chokeslam Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    This is a good list, and I like the idea of an article featuring the various hard luck cartoon characters. The only problem is that several of these characters really aren't retro, Meg Griffin, Brian Griffin, Carl, Klaus and even Kenny McCormick. Would have been better if you had left them out and said more about the ones that actually are retro.
    AtlantaCommercials Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    Totally agree with Sylvester and Tom. Poor guys getting screwed by those jerk ''protagonists'' just because they were acting by their natural instincts.
    I HATE Jerry and Tweety for being dicks for those poor souls.
    MoranisFan1991 Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    In more recent seasons of South Park, it seems that the shaft has spread to Stan, Kyle, and Butters, and I hate that it happens to the former 2, but for Butters, at least he's able to see the silver lining.
    Radi0 Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    I think the title of this article is misleading. I thought, by the title, that you meant characters which were either ignored or misused by their writers/creators. What you really meant is characters that have intentionally (i.e. purposely written) bad luck. With that clarification, the article is OK.
    The Ronin Identity Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    haha... i love Ol' Gil
    palmer10 Posted 1 year 7 months ago
    Some a lot less retro than others but I enjoyed your choices. Thumbs up.
    Score:
    26
    More from MrCleveland
    © Retro Junk | Contact | Report a Bug | Privacy Policy | Advertise