There are many things about living through the 1980's that I miss. Many, many things. There are also a great many things I am so glad are long gone.
Much of what I associate with the latter, belong in the annals of long forgotten parts of the American vernacular. And it is from this that I've been inspired to present to you. . . . .


1. Face! - It's putting it mildly to describe this word, formerly used by someone to imply that you have somehow been shown to be inferior at something or in some way, as the voice equivalent of fingernails across a chalkboard. After so many years of it's use, one cannot be blamed for imagining stabbing it's user in the cheek with a dull pencil. Thankfully, those of us living today only know this word as it relates to the general area of the human body that we used to imagine plunging our pencils into.

2. Homefry - With sooooo many words in the english vocabulary available to confer the status of friendship, what on earth drove someone to begin calling a friend a "homefry"? Was it as simple as comparing the enjoyment of a diced potato to that of time spent with friends, or was it something much deeper? Is it possible that one day, some boy named Humphrey became friends with a foreign exchange student who repeatedly pronounced his name wrong?
If so, curse you Humphrey. CURSE YOU!!!

3. No Doy! - I realize that this is actually two words. However, as the word "Doy" was used with and without adding "No" to the beginning, I included it so both were represented. That aside, I have always been and will forever be stupified by the use of both. Other variations of this phrase bestirred the feeble minds of 80's kids (No duh! No **** Sherlock! Duh! Der!).
But I perceived this version as I would a 4th or 5th sequel to a movie that was already unwatchable.

4. Righteous - The word "righteous", in and of itself, is really quite palatable. Only when some random moron from the 80's starts using it to gain fame among his peers for creating a replacement for "cool", does it make me cringe. Suddenly not only are the devout faithful "righteous", but so are car engines, video games, skateboard moves, and articles of clothing. I don't suspect we will encounter any of these things, or anyone using the aforementioned word for anything other than it's original intended meaning, in Heaven. Thank you Lord.

5. Psych! - In the 80's, I had a stepbrother who used the word "Psych!" as though every time he uttered it, he would be compensated by the government. Used as a means to make you understand you have in some way been fooled or made a fool of, this word can and did quickly become a cancer to my mind. Because it is way too difficult to simply exclaim "Fooled you!", or "Got ya!". Even better is to draw out the process of spewing the word. Why just yell the word quickly when you can increase it's annoyance by saying "Psyyyyeeeeeek!" My stepbrother also occasionally added his own touch by announcing "Psych Mike Trike!" Do you realize how painful it was to even type that?

Ghost of Vapor (