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  • Rimmer/Lister: Rimmer: "I used to be in the Samaritans."
    Lister: "I know. For one morning."
    Rimmer: "I couldn't take any more."
    Lister: "I don't blame you. You spoke to five people and they all committed suicide. I wouldn't mind, but one was a wrong number!
    -Rimmer/Lister
  • Red Dwarf